LADIES OF HIVE CONTEST #123 : WHY THERE ARE SO MANY LONELY PEOPLE? WHY ITS HARD FOR PEOPLE TO MAKE REAL CONNECTION?.
Hello wonderful ladies of hive. I am so delighted to take part in this contest.
Loneliness oftentimes is a choice made by people to protect and safeguard their territory; othertimes it's a state one doesn't have any control over.
- There is this popular believe that it is better to be alone than to be in a relationship or friendship of any sort that would cost one his/her peace. A lot of people have been hurt and betrayed by people they trust thus they decided to build a wall around them and never let anyone close to them again. The people in this school of thought find happiness within themselves. To you they are lonely but to them they are at peace.
The second group of loners are the ones that find it difficult to fit in. It's not because they lack self confidence but because they don't feel any sense of connection to even make a move to connect. For one to actually connect to another there must be something bringing them together; something they share in common. I was so lonely in my first year in college; never felt like connecting with any of the girls in my department. The first friend i actually made in college was a girl from a different department. We met during one of the tons of registration processes and we started talking. We share the same life philosophy and we became best of friends till today.
Ella is a very pretty lady but no one will ever believe that she is single. She told me that most people doesn't believe her when she tell that she is available for dating. Many men will see her and admire her beauty but they will end up not asking her out because in their mind they assumed that such a beautiful lady must be in a very serious relationship.
So assumption is another barrier that deter people from making real connections .
She might not like me
He looks mean, will he give me audience?
She is way above my league
These and more are the excuses we assumed by ourselves that directly or indirectly stop us from making connection to people we actually need to.
Loneliness as an Inherent behavior: i have a cousin sister that her first child Ini was already eleven years old before she gave birth to her second child. This made Ini to like her own space. Infact she is in love with her own space. She is feels safe on her own and would escape to be alone in her room whenever they have guest. I found that behavior weird that i considered her to be a lonely child but soon i got to understand that she grew up just that way.
The last of them all are those that lack self confidence. They often feel that they have nothing to offer or bring to the table so it's better they stay on their own instead of embarrassing themselves.
Some of them think they are not beautiful enough or rich enough to connect with some certain type of people that they really need in their life thus they crawl back into their shell and watch life leave them behind.
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