Human growth and development is comprised of several stages and milestones. We learn to walk and talk gradually. We learn to navigate our environment in a step-by-step manner. We develop an understanding of our environment.
In our journey to growth and development, the guidance, support and encouragement of our parents make the journey exciting.
Our parents make things easier for us by lending their hands and telling us the method to perform actions.
The simple act of throwing a ball or hitting the ball with a bat becomes so much an accomplishment for a child when s/he gets applauses from her/his parents. Being applauded for small acts like putting things back in their place makes a child feel like a victor.
Looking for the approval of our parents we keep on developing the standards for dos and don’ts. Our habits and attitudes are developed.
On our way to growth and development, stepping up milestone after milestone, there comes a time for the arrival of puberty.
While all the other stages of development have their significance, puberty is crucially significant. It is a time of enormous transition in one’s physiology and psychology. It accompanies so many drastic changes in one’s mind and body that makes one vulnerable to a number of social and mental crises.
Puberty is the time when a child needs proper guidance about the changes occurring in his/her body. Otherwise, confusions and assumptions make things stressful for the person.
I don't know about how children are educated about puberty and its significance in other parts of the world. I just know about mine. And I am quite sorry to say that parents do not fulfil their responsibility in this regard.
It is the responsibility of parents to guide children about what the changes in their bodies are the sign of, what these children have now got the ability of and how they are supposed to embrace these changes.
Puberty is something that deserves to be celebrated and appreciated. Unfortunately, the lack of guidance or the misguidance by the parents in my society the onset of puberty becomes a terrible part of the growing child’s life.
I have myself experienced the suffering for a long time until I understood the fact that it is not a misery but indication of healthy female growth. Believe me, it took me four or five years to understand this fact.
Among girls, the beginning of menstrual cycle indicates that puberty has finally started. When my menstrual cycle began I was a little above 11. I had no idea about any such thing was coming. When it started I was terrified by what was happening to me.
The icing on the cake was that when my mom figured out that my cycle had began, she guided me to wear pads but her expressions towards this incident were troublesome for me.
She looked worried and she told me to let anyone know about this. 😨 It is horrible, isn’t it? I mean being contaminated with something that should be kept secret from others..... doesn’t it make you feel guilty?
(Well, her suggestion for keeping it a secret was due to stupid attitude of adults in my society. When elder ladies find about a young girl having her cycle, they behave give strange kind of smiles and gestures as if they have got access to a dark secret of you. Huuuuuh. Anyways........)
I felt like something terribly wrong was happening to me. I cried silently. I prayed hard to God to make me normal.
Even when I asked my mom (at the occurrence of 4th or 5th time cycle) why does this happens to me, her reply made me feel worse. She said something like it is a tribulation woman has to face.
I felt really bad about this occurrence. Moreover, I was not given proper guidance about pubic hair. Their presence and growth stressed me a lot. I kept wondering what I should do with them.
Anyways, the time went on. Gradually, I figured out that it was not only me who was having this but many of my fellows do face this.
After studying biology in grade 9, I finally understood that menstruation is the sign of the proper functioning of women’s hormones. It is the thing that indicates the woman’s reproduction ability.
After understanding the significance of the situation, I started being grateful for the thing that initially appeared like a nightmare to me.
I am pretty sure, I was not the only child who faced such a situation. It is the story of thousands of girls in my society.
I am not sure how many contemporary mothers have decided to guide their children properly, I have come across several girls of my age facing a similar kind of problem (i.e. no guidance from mothers.)
I will never want my daughter to pass through any distressful feelings like the ones I faced. I will guide her properly so that she can feel happiness instead of feeling guilt.
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This is my participation for Hive Learner’s featured contest.
