I'm 100% in agreement with you. I think that talking through these perspectives, while challenging and will naturally cause dissent, only serves the lgbtq+ movement as we find a way to hold the nuance and complexity of gender issues. Along with heavy cognitive loads is that "they/them" pronouns are something that's been enforced and demanded for the public to comply with and practice, rather than called in with dialogue to create shared meaning and understanding. I actually sense that people are more likely to disagree with how pronouns are enforced, rather than disagree with the idea that people don't want to identify as female or male.

Have you heard of neopronouns? I learned about it from a few teenagers when I was working at the high school. Basically it's a way to identify yourself without conventional gender meanings. I accept this more than trying to change a word with preexisting meaning/knowledge like "they." Like what you did in Brockton Exodus.