It all begins with desire. If the 'burn' to change is not 'hot' enough your chances of success are limited. You GOTTA WANNA change. There must be a sincere sense of remorse. You no longer want to entertain this habit. The price has been a heavy one, emotionally physically and financially.
When the pain of NOT changing exceeds the pain of change.........you'll change.
A sense of desperation is an important foundation on which to build the new you. It is a desperation born of recognising and accepting the devastating effect of a PAST life. For me it was recognising the family including children that my addiction had negatively impacted on. It was contemplating what I really wanted in life. I needed to SEE the future me, my life and people that were to be part of it.
Remorse is critically important. When one truly feels remorseful you will want to forgive yourself. As uncomfortable and humbling it might be you will also want to seek forgiveness from those you have harmed and hurt. Best you know that some will forgive you and some won't. MOVE ON. It is their choice and they have to live with their decision.
The desire to change is paramount and is the first step in the process. To help you with that, jot down the reasons for wanting to change. You have to know your WHY. I call it peeling the onion. Every time you write down a reason ask yourself why that reason. You will write down another reason. Again ask yourself why that reason. You will eventually get to the core reason - your real WHY. And like an onion causes you to tear up, so will this introspective exercise. The more deep seated your why the more motivated you will be to make the sacrifices required to change.
Sacrifice happens when you desire and decide to have something more valuable.
If you are genuine about ridding yourself of a habit you will work through your why. When you sincerely DESIRE change and you feel YOU WANNA do this then my next article on the second step BELIEF will be of interest to you.
