Years ago we gave my daughter a car, our 'old' car, which wasn't old at all. We were just trying to help her. It wasn't the car she wanted. She sold it, put a few of her own dollars in and bought the car she did want. My husband was put out by that decision--I was not. After all, what we wanted was to give her value, to give her reliable transportation. Once we gave the car away, we had no further interest in it.

However, if I had given her clothes to donate to a charity, and she had sold those, I would have been very upset. I would have considered that a misappropriation, an abuse of my generosity. I think it's a matter of being true to the intent of the giver.

As for buying clothes I want: My husband and I are at the stage in life where it seems we won't be outliving our money (you never know, in an uncertain world, though). If I want something, I buy it. Fortunately, there is not much I want. Example: I bought a new pair of sandals this summer because the old pair (8 years old?) were beginning to deteriorate. Problem is, I have new sandals and still have not discarded the old. Not exactly hoarding, but a bad sign :))