And here we begin another week.....my heart is still reeling with pain from losing my grandmother. I have been so distraught that I can't seem to function in my daily life. Thursday night was terrible, I just went bat crazy on Brad (the hubby)...and while at the time, I felt as though I had good reasoning...I didn't. Then Friday morning, I had no school uniforms for Caleb to wear....apparently I hadn't washed any laundry in well over 6 days by now. I woke up an hour before us leaving for school, which is very late for me, and was rushed to wash a school uniform for my sweet baby.
I almost forgot his lunch (fortunately I didn't), I forgot to pack him an after school snack for extended care (this is an after school care for the kids), to be frank, I forgot to tell him he was going to be staying in extended care. For his homework he has to complete one hour of a math computer program each week and I didn't remind him to do any of it.....I think he maybe finished 15 minutes total for the week.
After getting to work and just crying my eyes out from being a complete and utter failure of a wife and mom, I felt a little better when the hubs called and talked to me a little bit. He apologized for not stepping up and doing more. Granted, I will agree....Caleb and I were very close to my grandmother and this really threw both of us out quite a few notches. So I do think that it would have been good for Brad to have stepped up and helped with Caleb's homework, laundry, etc. But to be honest, the fact that he even noticed on his own what he could have done and apologized for it...well I can't be mad at him. Of course, the forgiveness was really given after he came home and did 5, yes I said FIVE, loads of laundry while I sat on the couch and ate Girl Scout Cookies into an oblivion.
Caleb and I took Saturday to rest and recoup from the week and did absolutely nothing, which was good being that I had to recover from my sugar induced hangover. But it was then that I decided enough was enough. While the pain is excruciating still, I know that my Granny is watching down on me and she wouldn't put up with me acting this way towards my family.
So this morning, I got up and forced myself to be productive. I was up at the usual 5:00 am, doing laundry, unloading dishwasher, getting dressed and actually applying a full face of makeup. I only did bare minimum, which was foundation and my eyebrows, nearly all last week, except for at the funeral. I figured there was no point in putting on makeup if it's just going to run down my face when i cried. I also fixed my hair this morning, but the rain screwed that up...but hey, I did at least try.
Caleb had lunch, snack and breakfast this morning. He completed his chores and he was excited to get a jump start on his math program with Brad's help this morning. The grieving may not be over completely but, I can't continue to ignore everything in my life because of it.
Well, that's my ramble for today. It felt good to get it out of my system and into words. I know this isn't my usual makeup post, but I think this helped me clear my head a bit. I will be back again on Wednesday with a real makeup post. I have a couple of reviews to do for you. One is on a foundation and the other an anti-wrinkle cream that I have been using for about 9 weeks now. Do you think it worked? I will let you know soon.
Thanks for listening and I will be back again really soon. Until next time, take care.
-Kim
