It's quite paradoxical to say that we live in an era where everyone seems to be connected to each other with a proximity as close as the finger tips, and yet there exists a great divide when it comes to a real and personal relationship.
Each day unfolds with it's own emptiness, it's void, it's loneliness and the need to find that special someone in our fantasies that'll come and suppress such feelings.
So we venture out into the wild streets of each social media platform, having an unrealistic picturesque of the ideal man or woman that possesses the key to unlocking the doors to our happiness.
We keep scrolling and scrolling, but never satisfied. We keep on the hunt and routine for hours everyday, with a personal conviction that somehow we are having fun, and most of all getting together (by socializing).
The bitter truth is that we almost always shut out from our mind, deliberately trying to sequester the reality from our fantasies that in fact, the people who matter the most in our lives are the ones we see each day physically, the ones we interact with, the ones who bestow on us different shades of life.
Ranging from heart breaks to love, from betrayal to trust, and most importantly, the ones who understand us for who we are in reality, and not the virtual world we compose of ourselves on the internet.
A recent study carried out in one of the prestigious universities in Australia amongst ten students who were divided into two groups of 5's, revealed with all accuracy the following results.
The first set of five students who were classified under "group-A" are the ones who spent most of their leisure time on social media, the ones who had the most friends and followers, the ones with the most likes and shares on various media platforms.
The ones whom the media platforms recognized their interactions as trending and also mustered in multitudes of comments on their profiles.
The second set of five students were classified under "group-B", where a group of nerds, unpopular, devoted, and isolated people when it comes to their influence on the social media.
Who gave little or no inclination to spending more time worried about what's trending and what's not.
Results proved with no iota of doubt from this small sample of evaluation that the ones who were seemingly left out or awkward in the world of the social media, actually spent more real hours with the people around them, the few family and friends they interacted with.
As you may have probably guessed right.
There is something about the human mind that resonates across every race and every being, and that is the fact that it cannot stand or bear to face the void or emptiness of loneliness. Somehow it is designed to adapt by filling in that hollow with an activity that could grow into a habit or an obsession.
Many would arguably say that they pay very little visits to the social media platforms when they are bored, others might comply and admit to that simmering feeling of wanting to bond with someone completely new, someone who doesn't know our past or present life, someone with whom we can start a new chapter with on a clean slate of veneering politeness and charm.
But the bitter truth is that no matter how we try to convince ourselves that we can shut out the real world out there, one where people are not all nice, one where people get hurt, one in which is pivoted on a seesaw of ups and downs, deep inside there is a part of our soul that is trying to reach out for completeness and in so doing, we daily get entangled in the labyrinth of searching for such in our daily reveries.
What then is the essence of life?, the purpose of our daily awakening, the pursuit for true happiness and ultimate joy with the people we deeply and truly care about??
If these answers can quickly be obtained by a snap of fingers stricken on keypads that propose to satisfy our needs for companionship, then a whole lot of us would be left out in the darkness of seclusion.
We have looked far and wide for the remedies to our problems but in our search we have overlooked one of the greatest of all and that is the love that emanates from those around our immediate surrounding, it could be at work, at home or at school.
Not the love of a person who is a thousand miles apart from us, not the care of a friend we cannot but see on a screen. Not a feeling that is interposed by electronic networks. But the one that is felt by the warmness of a genuine home, a family, and a dear friend with whom we feel and touch.
Not to sound too conservative and repellent to modern technology of the social media, off course it is a cutting edge tool to reaching out to billions of people across the globe in a flash, it's a smarter way of advertising and broadcasting without limits.
But when it comes to its ambivalent influence on our interpersonal relationship with humans, then it raises a flag.
A flag that's stained with reds of insidious emotional forks.
We see young people being depressed and caught up in the wave of neglect simply because they couldn't get much likes or recognition on a social media platform, we see married couples comparing their spouses to the people they sometimes stumble into online.
The people who break under the strain of too great success do so because they can endure it only in imagination, and not in reality.
-Robert Green
This is not so far fetched from our daily routine, because the people who break under the strain of having an imaginary immaculate virtual friend do so because they can only endure it their imaginations and fantasies, rather than in reality.
The fantasy requires no commitment, it demands no constraints and devotions to the other party. It offers so much leeway to both parties in the friendship, at such, so many cling on to the easy and less demanding task.
The key to getting out of the isolation within the crowd of the media is to take your time and get "Unplugged!"
Make out time, I mean valuable time to hangout with real people in person.
Take a moment of appreciation on a daily basis or at least once in a while no matter how paltry the time may be, to let those around you feel the effervescence of been together with you.
Not to completely shut out oneself from the social world out there online is the key, but striking a balance that priorities the need for more physical experience.
Taking into account that conversations and interactions in the physical world with the people we see should be used as barometers to judge our characters and lifestyle, and not the comments or replies we get on the social media.
Just as we often overlook the little things that matter around us most of time, we are quick to disdain that which is almost always readily available until we see it no more, then we might at some point value its significance.
This is often the case for people who have not sedulously taken their time to cultivate the habit of appreciating the kindness, things and person's around them
We live in a generation that is highly demanding, a time in the history of human existence when everybody is looking to get something from someone, but nobody is willing to say, "I'm looking for people who want to take something from me".
A time in our life where people who are in deep search for love and respect, but they are not willing to give out that which they desire.
A time where people are seeking for all manner of satisfaction, ranging from peace, freedom, romance, joy, recognition and many more, but they are yet to give out anything.
If we take a closer look at the human anatomy, you'd notice that in order for the human system to rehydrate, it has to get rid of it's fluids in so many ways. By sweat, by urine, by tears, through our saliva and always on a daily basis.
Imagine if your body never got rid of all the fluids it had to take in, that would result in a disaster. So it is, when we want to take in all the love and recognition, support and care, but we are reluctant to give out.
We want to always be rehydrated with romantic fantasies, fairy tales of abundance, yet we are not willing to first give out the little tokens of gratitude and benevolence from the corners of our existence.
No wonder it only rains more in areas where it floods more, no wonder people who are loved the most are the ones who have at all cost loved others denied themselves and laid down every bit and pieces of them for others to have.
So before we plug into the social world of things, before we scroll for hours of emptiness, take a minute or even a second and tell someone in reality how much they mean to the world.
Make someone each blessed day, to feel the delight and joy of being alive. Before we click on the nude post or video to satisfy that deep urge, take a minute to appreciate the ones who are clothed around you.
Before we whine and complain bitterly on how much neglect we experience, take a minute and tell someone how much important that person is to be alive.
And so, one by one, minute by minute, day by day, as we spread the word, the love, to the ones we see and speak to, our little confinement, we gradually create an aura of love and self-satisfaction that no other person or thing can ever offer.
An illumination that no darkness of despair and depression can overshadow!
And I tell you on the other side today, that it's no coincidence for you to read this right now. It means at this point, you are meant to know that the world needs you, it needs your influence, it can not be complete without your existence.
Yes you! You matter to the world today. Brighten the corner where you are!
Don't be so busy that you forget to shine, don't be so caught up in your own mess and challenges that you forget to spread the word of hope.
Sometimes all it takes is to give a glimmer of what we deeply desire to someone out there who has nothing to hold on to but that glimmer.
Cheers 🎉🎉🎉
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