Sharing should never be forced, because it will only generate feelings of resentment and possessiveness in the child. That is to say, that object that caught his attention and with which he wants to learn will no longer have the purpose of play or learning. As parents we tend to repeat to our children incessantly the phrase "we have to share", every time they come to the park and another child wants his toy, or if he wants the swing where he is mounted.
Para nosotros los adultos es muy fácil decirles a nuestros hijos que compartan lo que están usando, cuando otro niño se los pide (o exige) e incluso nos enojamos con ellos cuando se niegan a hacerlo porque siempre tenemos un afán exagerado por obligar a los niños a presta a compartir sus cosas con los demás, incluso en situaciones en las que no es oportuno.
For us adults it is very easy to tell our children to share what they are using, when another child asks (or demands) and we even get angry with them when they refuse to do so because we always have an exaggerated desire to force children He is willing to share his things with others, even in situations where it is not appropriate.
Ahora bien, si fueras tú que te encuentras usando algo como tu celular y alguien se acerca y te lo pide, ¿se lo darías porque tenemos que ser compartidos? Probablemente tu respuesta sea NO. Entonces, ¿por qué tenemos que exigir algo que nosotros mismos no haríamos?
Now, if you were to find yourself using something like your cell phone and someone came up and asked you, would you give it to them because we have to be shared? Your answer is probably NO. So why do we have to demand something that we ourselves would not do?
Nunca se le debe decir a un niño que deben compartir algo que están usando, debido a que está trabajando para alcanzar su perfección personal, porque los niños aprenden mucho cuando trabajan solos y sin interrupciones y durante el juego, el cerebro va realizando mil conexiones para desarrollarse y entender todo lo que le rodea.
A child should never be told that they should share something they are wearing, because they are working towards their personal perfection, because children learn a lot when they work alone and without interruptions and during play, the brain makes a thousand connections to develop and understand everything around you.
Por eso, si vemos a nuestro hijo entretenido con algo y le exigimos que lo de a alguien más, lo único haremos es interrumpir ese aprendizaje. Lo ideal es que el otro niño espere a que se deje de usar el juguete o el objeto para usarlo.
Therefore, if we see our son entertaining with something and we demand that he give it to someone else, the only thing we will do is interrupt that learning. Ideally, the other child should wait for the toy or object to be stopped to use it.
Al no exigirle a nuestros hijos, no lo estamos haciendo mal educado, al contrario, le estamos enseñando el respeto a los demás y a esperar su turno y con el tiempo nos daremos cuenta que nuestros hijos compartirán las cosas por sí solos, sin necesidad de pedírselos, le estamos enseñando que si alguien está usando algo, lo que debe hacer es esperar hasta que se termine de usar porque no está disponible; y mientras, el pequeño puede tomar algún objeto que no esté en uso o realizar otra actividad.
By not demanding of our children, we are not doing it rude, on the contrary, we are teaching respect to others and to wait their turn and over time we will realize that our children will share things on their own, without having to ask them. We are teaching you that if someone is using something, what you should do is wait until it is finished using it because it is not available; and meanwhile, the little one can take an object that is not in use or carry out another activity.
No caigamos en el error de quitarle el juguete u objeto de la mano de nuestros hijos para dejárselo a otros niños porque en ese momento nuestro hijo se quedara llorando porque no entiende la situación. Es muy posible que nosotros tampoco la entendiéramos si otro adulto nos quita nuestro celular, así sin más, sólo porque... ¡hay que compartir!
Let's not make the mistake of taking the toy or object from our children's hands to leave it to other children because at that moment our child will cry because he does not understand the situation. It is very possible that we would not understand it either if another adult took away our cell phone, just like that, just because ... we have to share!
Así que la próxima vez que tu pequeño hijo acuda a ti enojado porque otro niño no quiera compartir, recuerda que no vivimos en un mundo donde sea obligatorio dar todo lo que tienes a cualquiera sólo porque te lo pida.
So the next time your young child comes to you angry that another child does not want to share, remember that we do not live in a world where it is mandatory to give everything you have to anyone just because they ask.
Lo importante es no obligarlos a compartir, sino enseñarlos a hacerlo. Y para eso se deben dar varias circunstancias:
The important thing is not to force them to share, but to teach them to do so. And for that, several circumstances must be given:
Que esté preparado para hacerlo, que al compartir no se quede sin nada, que la felicidad de otro niño, no signifique su disgusto, debemos preguntar a nuestro hijo si desea prestar su juguete primero que todo, y si decide no hacerlo, debemos respetar su decisión, debemos ser su ejemplo, deben ver en nosotros mismos esa generosidad con los demás para que puedan replicar su conducta.
That he is prepared to do it, that when sharing he does not run out of anything, that the happiness of another child, does not mean his displeasure, we must ask our son if he wants to lend his toy first of all, and if he decides not to do it, we must respect his decision, we must be their example, they must see in ourselves that generosity with others so that they can replicate their behavior.