Aladdin and the Magic Lamp
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How would you like to spend your wedding night with your head in the water closet? This is what happened to the grand-vizier's son. As for the princess, she could not sleep at all, while Aladdin was near her, sleeping like a baby.
ON THE TWENTIETH NIGHT
Sheherazade said:
And the genie of the lamp raised his hand to his forehead and answered: “I listen and I obey!" and disappeared. And Aladdin went to find his mother and sat down beside her and began to talk quietly about this and that, not caring more about the princess's marriage than if none of that had happened. And, when evening came, he left his mother to go to bed and went back to his room, where he locked himself up again, and waited for the genie to return. And that's it for him!
As for the wedding of the grand-vizier's son, behold! When the feasts and the ceremonies and the receptions and the rejoicings were over, the newlywed, preceded by the chief eunuch, entered the bridal chamber. And the chief eunuch hastened to withdraw and close the door behind him. And the newlywed, after undressing, lifted the mosquito net and went to lie down in bed, to await the arrival of the princess. However, she was not long in making her entrance, accompanied by her mother and the women of her retinue, who undressed her, dressed her in a simple silk shirt, and untied her hair. Then they put her into bed as if by force, while, according to the custom of newlyweds in such circumstances, she pretended to resist a lot and turned around in all directions, trying to escape from their hands. And when they had put her to bed, without trying to look at the vizier's son who was already lying there, they retired altogether, making vows for consummation. And the mother, who was the last to leave, closed the bedroom door, heaving, as usual, a great sigh.
However, as soon as the two newlyweds found themselves alone, and before they had time to make the slightest caress, they suddenly felt lifted with their bed, without being able to realize what was happening to them. And, in the blink of an eye, they saw themselves transported out of the palace and deposited in a place they did not know, and which was none other than Aladdin's bedroom. And, while they were plunged in terror, the genie came and prostrated himself before Aladdin and said to him: "Your order, O my master, is carried out. And here I am ready to obey you for all that you have left to command me!" And Aladdin answered him: "It only remains for me to ask you to kidnap this young matchmaker and lock him up for the whole night in the toilettes!" And, tomorrow morning, come back here to take my orders!" And the genie of the lamp hastened to obey. He therefore brutally kidnapped the vizier's son and went to lock him up in the water closet, burying his head in the hole. And he threw on him a cold and stinking breath which immobilized him like a piece of wood in the situation in which he found himself. And that's it for him!
As for Aladdin, when he was alone with Princess Badrou'l-Boudour, he never thought for a moment, despite the great love he felt for her, of abusing the situation. And he began by bowing before her, holding his hand to his heart, and in a very passionate voice he said to her: "O princess, know that you are safer here than in the palace of the sultan, your father! If you find yourself in this place you don't know, it's only so that you don't suffer the caresses of this young cretin, son of your father's vizier! And I, although I am the one to whom you have been promised in marriage, I will be careful not to touch you, before the time has come and before you have become my lawful wife, by the Book and by the Sunnah!"
At these words of Aladdin the princess could not understand anything, first because she was very moved and because, then, she did not know both the old promise of her father and all the particulars of the affair. And, not knowing what to say, she contented herself with crying a great deal. And Aladdin, to prove to her that he had no bad intentions about her and to reassure her, threw himself fully dressed on the bed, in the very place occupied by the vizier's son, and took the precaution of putting a bare sword between her and him, to clearly show that he meant to kill himself rather than touch her, even with the tips of his fingers. And he even turned his back towards the princess, so as not to get in the way of her anywhere. And he fell asleep peacefully, no more caring about Badrou'l-Boudour's much-desired presence than if he were alone in his bachelor's bed.
As for the princess, the emotion that this strange adventure caused her, and the new situation in which she found herself, and the tumultuous thoughts which agitated her, sometimes with terror and sometimes with amazement, prevented her from closing her eyes all night. But, of course! she was even less to be pitied than the vizier's son, who was in the water closet, his head buried in the hole, and who could not move because of the terrible breath that the genie struck to immobilize it. Be that as it may, the fate of the two spouses, for a first wedding night, was nothing but very distressing and very calamitous...
— At this point in her narration, Scheherazade saw the morning appear and quietly fell silent.
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