Inside my chest there is a solution to all my problems. - #Steemletters - (Letter 3)


Inside my chest there is a solution to all my problems

In recent days I faced different sides of myself. I was happy, sad, bored, screaming and asking for silence, wanting to go to fight, and also inevitably appeasing the spirits. After so many blunders and stupidity, I decided it's time to stop. Stop running so much. Stop worrying so much. Stop trying to have everything under control.

I realized it was time to put a stop to this crazy need to be the hand that moves the ventriloquist when I realized that at the end of day, at bedtime on the pillow, right there in the silence of the room falls to record that no I don't managed nothing in the endless twenty-four hours. Neither my impulses. Not my will. Just I spent my energies. Only irritated me. Only brought more unnecessary weight to my already tired shoulders.

Now, in front of the anxiety which arose in my day, in front of the agony of not being able to control all tasks in front of the fear of not pleasing or can not become everything I dreamed for me, I see myself as someone who is no longer present . Today, I am a guy who remembers the past and has both feet firmly planted in the future. What has not happened, what might not even happen. As I try to control to turn reality.

As the first step to healing is to recognize sick, I realized that I spent the acceptable limit of anxiety, crossed the strip, but now I'm slowing down. Could put the blame on the excitement of the days, the amount of responsibility I took, but I'm tired of making excuses to justify my mistakes.

It is inside my chest that are born anguish. It is inside my chest that happiness lives. So, before pointing any alien defect, I need to take care of me. Who I am. And there is only one way to achieve this - separating a portion of my time to listen to me. To talk to me. To carry out my wishes. Just me, the guy who lives inside me and the silence of the room.


For some of you who already follow me for some time I would like to say about the idea of posts using the new tag, #steemletters, and make small texts in forms of short stories and chronicles. I had this idea to adapt the little time left in the day to write and post something. So I hope all of you enjoy. 

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