Me Time

2010 Arnold Attic Joey BgxWBRxjvNhnbM9DiyHtCptYaDNF3xx85r8if8spuMjfmZzsmoBcsZbqhrLBkwSjW288RW1Moom6XQ1qC4hXzx6wEiyASF3iaAmvtzAmHKGEES8ioB4XpHWGeL5nctUegt5r68FADSGYQFHoF5BMM9zQkr3x5MwhrKjp9FZigp45iPx.png

Ignoring Us-Time?

I've been learning how to make more time for people in my life. I've been reflecting on that. I was trying to sleep a few minutes ago, and my mind went back to 2001, back to when I was sixteen years old. I went to the house of my friend, Bill Bailey, in North Plains, Oregon, USA. We've been friends since maybe 1995. We made some home videos in 1996. My younger sister, Crystal, befriended Bill's younger sister, Janet. They lived in our neighborhood, house number 39, during the 1990's. Bill showed me how to beat Sonic 2 on the Sega Genesis. During the late 90's, we played a bunch of video games.

2013 Late January in Binh Hoa Near Hanoi.jpg
January, 2013 - Hoa Binh, Vietnam - Near Hanoi

Chronology of My Biography

1920's - 1930's - 1940's - 1950's - 1960's - 1980's - 1985 - 1986 - 1987 - 1988 - 1989 - 1990's - 1990 - 1991 - 1992 - 1993 - 1994 - 1995 - 1996 - 1997 - 1998 - 1999 - 2000's - 2002 - 2003 - 2004 - 2005 - 2007 - 2008 - 2009 - 2010 - 2011 - 2012 - 2015 - 2018
Join the Infowars Army

One Time At Band Camp?

Just kidding, but seriously, one time, they lived in Troutdale, which is on the other side of Portland (PDX). Their parents picked us kids up a few times to take us to their house, which took over an hour drive from Forest Grove, my home city. When I look back to my childhood, I think about Tiffany Cumbo. She was a fun friend from the 90's. I think about Bhakti & Juya Sa, two brothers who lived next door to us, house number 164, from 1993-1994. I think about Tony, my Mexican friend. I probably met him when I was three. I think about my other neighbor, from house number 162, Kyle Vanderzanden.

2014-12-04 - JA Banner Fav People Things Pop Culture.jpg

My favorite childhood friend was Bill.

Second favorite was Tiffany. I was homeschooled and was not around hundreds of kids. I was humble, timid, caring, shy. I was a pretty nice kid. So, some kids liked me because of how calm and sweet I was. I was very polite. However, during my teens, my confidence started turning me into Darth Vader, slowly, gradually, through my commitments.

infinite altitude art

Infinite Altitude

I was thinking about when I was at Bill's house in 2001. I was playing that snowboarding game, SSX Tricky, by myself, on Bill's Sony Playstation, for hours. Bill left his room and was doing other things. At the time, I didn't focus enough on Bill. I didn't try to consider what Bill wanted to do or not do. I didn't ask him how he felt. I was simply trying to master a snowboarding game. I was committed to that goal. In my life, that is what I would do by myself.

sand castles
Summer 1997 - Sand Castle - Joey, Rick, & Crystal Arnold - Oregon Beach

Generally, I would complete tasks by myself.

When my uncle, Woof, took us to the beach, I would make sandcastles. I wouldn't spend too much time in waves, the actual water part of the beach. I was isolated, possibly too isolated some might argue. I wouldn't try to spend time with kids, with people in general. At Bible clubs, I would memorize verses and recite them in order to win prizes. Having commitment is a good thing. So, long story short, I've lived a life of being committed to goals. I focus on a task, and I complete the tasks. I generally do the opposite of procrastination. So, commitment is an awesome character trait. There is a time and a place for commitment.


Tale of Two Cities

However, there is also a time for teamwork, collaboration, socializing, for coming together. As I grew up, I would grow in my ability to get things done. So, for example, when I was at Bill's house, AKA his grandma's house, I was becoming too selfish. Yes, I wasn't purposely intending to be too selfish. I was trying to have fun, at times at least. Generally, I would just get lost in a dare. I would dare myself to do things. Trying to beat that snowboarding game was a dare. I would try to beat Bill's scores. In that fighting game, Tekken, Bill would beat me all the time. I would always beg for a rematch. I would smash (potato mash) the controllers. People always told me not to hit the buttons so hard. I would try to hit them in different random combinations, as fast as I could. Smash the subscribe button, right? Just kidding, but something like that. I was a video game addict for years.


I was hoping for a lot of luck.

Maybe if I had billions of years, then I would have that chance at winning. All you need is time, right? I've been learning during the course of my 33 years of life so far that it is better to make time for people. It helps you and helps the other people when you join them in whatever they are doing, where they are, emotionally, not just physically. Connect, socially, not just mentally. Spiritually, you can try your best to relate to people around you, to empathize, sympathize, and realize so much. Pete Steele, who was a Word Of Life missionary in Oregon, was taking me to the airport in 2004, as I went off to WOLBI, my first college in Pottersville, New York. I said to him that I was surprised that he would take me to the airport. He was a busy guy. Pete said to me that if you're too busy for people, then you are too busy.


Rat Race of Life

So, back in 2001, I was beginning to become too busy even for Bill. That was the problem. I superimposed my me-time into our us-time. I was in a social setting, but I was acting as if I was all alone, playing games. I was acting like I was alone even when I was not alone. Some people have called me a mad scientist when I grow out my hair. I'm the love child of Harry Potter and Austin Powers. I'm kidding. But I'm not joking about how isolated I've been around friends.

cia ford

Of course, I still have my me-time.

But when I'm in a conversation, for example, I minimize my me-time in order to promote us-time. I can still isolate myself at church. When I'm around people, I can still do what I've always done in my life. I've been shy. I'm an introvert, not an extrovert, by default. I can do public speaking and have been told that I'm really good at it. I enjoy being in front of people more than small group conversations.


I have a switch I can turn on and off.

I can be introverted and then press a button and become suddenly outgoing like a social butterfly like I was in high school, during college, when I worked as a counselor at camps, and when I make videos especially. The difference between now in the 2010's and the 1990's is that I'm aware of a lot more now than ever before. So, I'm more aware of the balance I may have between my me-time and our us-time. I will at least contemplate talking to people around me now. The younger I was, the less I would do just that. I think about it more. I'm more aware of my surroundings more.

star wars

Socially Aware

If I went back in time to 2001, I would have asked Bill what he wanted to do. I'm more easy going around people now during us-time. But back then, I brought my me-time everywhere I went. Now, I can be harder on myself when I'm alone. I can be more committed to my projects when I'm alone. I can dedicate this time, right now, right here, to writing this, while I'm alone on my laptop, in my room. If I'm around other people, I will switch to a different mode in order to be more useful in the moment. So, when I was younger, I might have been harder on other people. I'm not saying that I'm not ever hard on people now. But before, I was probably unintentionally hard on others, indirectly. Perhaps, I didn't choose which battles to die on.

past toy story

When I was younger, I probably argued more.

Yeah, I still try to debate with people, but I try to do it less. But I was probably too distracted when I was younger. I was probably not making time for other people enough when I was younger. So, if I went back in time to 2001, I would ask Bill what he wanted to do. Now, maybe he would have said, "Keep playing, I'm busy." In that case, I would have kept playing on that Saturday for a few more hours like I did. But in real life, I didn't ask. I just did what I wanted to do as if it was my house, my game, my everything. Maybe I was feeling a bit too entitled. When I went to Bill's house, I would try to demand things. I was a little persuasive but also maybe too whiny like Anakin Skywalker (Darth Vader) was in Star Wars when he said that he didn't like sand. I would beg for whatever games I wanted to play. I would always push Bill to make videos with me. I would bring my camcorder & we made Blair Witch 2, A Duck's Life, Super Heroes In Bed, Red Dog Music Video, etc. Bill borrowed my camcorder, took it to his Glencoe High School in Hillsboro & to Joe's house. He had another friend named Joe, too. A lot of people had my name when I was a kid, during high school college, etc.

2007 BEOWOLF.jpg

After 2001, I didn't see Bill as often.

The last time I saw Bill might have been in 2003 for the funeral of our childhood friend, Tiffany Cumbo. As I sit here reflecting, I feel it is at least partly my fault for our split. You can argue that it was nobody's fault. If you were to ask Bill, he might say it just happened. Maybe it wasn't planned. We went on to do our own things after 2003. I've wrote to him a few times on Facebook since then. I might have called him one time on the phone in 2007. To some extent, it's nobody's fault. Plus, it is a variety of things. But at the same time, I still wonder how mean I might have been to him and to others. And even if being nicer wouldn't have made a difference with my friendship with Bill, it would have perhaps made me nicer to other people. And I always tried to be nice.

2007 Mayor Jeff Kids 01.jpg
October, 2007 - Joey Arnold, Jeff Walters, kids - Mayor's Wright, Honolulu, Hawaii
Revolution Hawaii - Year 2

So, it is not like I try to be mean.

But when I review my life, I consider the pros and cons of my behaviors. If I were to go back in time to 2001, I would be focused on entertaining Bill instead of what I did which was to entertain myself, beat a game, make a video, or whatever. It can generally be better to not let things distract us from more important things. What is more important than people? Well, people may be more important. And I'm still learning how to make time for people. And I still spend a lot of time with my me-time. But I try to think about people when I'm in us-times, when I'm socializing. I try to be more aware of the different modes. I try to figure out what is best. Being focused on an isolated task, like I did with the snowboarding game, is good. But then enemy of the best is something good. And in life, we don't have time to do everything. I try to tell people on Tagged and Facebook about the things that I care about. So, I'm still focused on beating games. I make up games. I make up goals that I try to achieve.


20K Facebook Followers?

Yeah, for example, I wanted 20,000 Facebook followers. So, I told thousands of random Vietnamese people to add me for many months. I went to random profiles, pages, groups, and commented, "I'm an English Teacher, add me." I was doing that in 2015. That message turned into "Add me." To this day, I still ask or tell people to add me. But I may spend less time doing that or I at least try to spend less time doing that. But I go to bed wrestling with all these thoughts about how I spend my time. I think about making videos like Pew Die Pie and others too. I think about making my own YouTube Rewind 2018 video as the one they made is the second most disliked video second only to Justin Bieber's Baby which came out in 2010.

will smith youtube rewind

Already, this week old video is pretty hated.

It has millions of dislikes. Right now, it's at 8.1 million dislikes. So, I think about making review videos. But then I worry that people may not watch my videos. I may not get enough money for my videos. I'm studying to get my driver's license. So, I spend time doing that. I spend my time telling people to join the Infowars Army. I spend all day writing, linking, trying to Red Pill, trying to do this, trying to do that. And like Alex Jones, I tend to feel like I'm not doing enough to help the world. I worry about doing too much and too little. I wonder if I make enough time for people. It is hard to sleep because my brain never stops. But people do inspire me and that is my song. So, that gets me up in the morning. Sleep helps me remember that. I pray for that reminder. I smile as I remember what Original Oatmeal is all about. I continue to try my best to archive my life. I'm believing in the process of at least trying to archive, to blog my life, to journal, to write, draw, film, design, sign, create, speak, live, teach, learn, experience, making the world greener one Oatmeal at a a time.

3 columns
2 columns
1 column
Join the conversation now