It's funny how you can live in Nature and still disconnect so much from it. I live in a constant quest for regulating the desires of the mind with the presence of the body (probably most of us do), and sometimes the mind can take over to such a degree that i can't see or feel at all how blessed i am to live here and experience this life.
The mind is usually in the future or the past. It is planning many great things to come and experience, and also having discussions about things that have no solution, as they have long happened.
I had been for quite a while working relentlessly for that bright future but at the same time i felt tired and out of balance. I realized that i had lost my connection, walking fast from here to there, doing lots of physical labor, hit this, break that, hammer over there.
One morning i decided to indulge in cannabis more than usual (I'm usually very modest in my consumption) and i couldn't shake off the need to take off my shoes. The energy of the soil ran up through my feet and up through my body immediately, refreshing me from inside. I went to stand a while to a section where i have medicinal plants growing and felt renewing myself, filled with pleasure and knowing myself as just another creature of that place. I was no more and no less than a bird, a plant, a tree.
After a while of that wonderful therapy, i ended up going back to work but from a whole different perspective. I decided to make some cob for a window that needs to be enclosed and once again returned to the feeling of playing a game rather than working. I was just painting a piece of art with the mud, nothing else, and it felt great.
The weather helped though, it was a particularly warm day so it was easy to unwind. It's curious how much the weather shapes your personality. When its cold i just need to move with toughness and motivate myself out of sheer will and ambition. I look forward to warmer days, to more connection and unwinding. Yet, I'm grateful i got to enjoy this and gain new energies to keep going 🙏