Don't lie to me!
We're not there yet. Family is a shoe-in but it takes years and years and years of developing a relationship or friendship, acquaintance or mutual respect for each other before we can just freely and openly lie to each other. Is this not the coolest set of urinals you've ever seen?
Things were so dope I kinda felt a little awkward pissing in it like 'is that a hand washing station or pisser?' Masterfully sculpted stainless steel beer kegs plumbed with 3/8" copper tubing. And when you flush one, they both flush, creating a stream-like symphony instantly cascading the dimly lit public toilet to a tropical oasis.
(Totally lied about the oasis part)
This isn't about urinals.
Sorry to back you up. Those of you on the edge of your seat, in deep concentration hoping for a handful of urinals and public toilets are gonna have to hold it. That isn't what this is about.
Well, unless of course you think public streets and footpaths decorated in everything from cigarette butts to dog shit, spent tampon applicators and toilet paper are toiletesque.
I just think if I didn't open with something fancy like custom keg urinals and a splash of humoUr our #teamuk tuned in wouldn't fancy this content and I don't want'em to turn the channel before we get to the good stuff. But, if England is home and your ability to venture around has been limited, you probably think this is normal:
It's not. And I'm from Los Angeles where even the infamous 6th street in downtown has street-sweepers that run between 7am and 10pm. Granted, between midnight and early morning hours you can hardly maneuver a vehicle through trash laden city streets in downtown but they're spotless by 0-8 hundred! Anyone caught on foot or behind the wheel in downtown LA at that time of night is outta their mind anyway.
I've never seen a street-sweeper in England. We've spent quite a bit of time in all four corners of the country. Maybe they run occasionally in London but I don't remember seeing any each time we've been there. Public trash cans are few and far in between too. Recently, at the train station in Leeds, I asked an attendant why there's no trash cans rubbish bins and was told for security reasons. Whatever the reason, they're hard to find. She said "leave your rubbish on the bench, an attendant will be by later to sort it."
Friends of ours came by and picked us up the other day. I kicked some trash out of the way upon entering their vehicle. I was waiting in the back seat of their car while Pura ran back upstairs right quick to grab whatever it was she forgot. I mentioned how out of all the places we've been, approaching nearly 20 countries now, with the exception of New York City and New York City only, England has the most garbage and cigarette butts I've seen on the streets.
Leigha, a real nice lady, both she and her husband are primary school teachers was surprised to hear me say that, "reeeaaally??" She asked while turning toward me from the passenger seat of their Volkswagen. "Rubbish, here in England? On the streets?! I guess I never noticed" and threw her banana peel out the window.
No fault of her own. When it's what you've been surrounded by your whole life, it's all you know. It isn't abnormal to her to avoid garbage by stepping over and around it or looking the other way en route to the market, bank, train station or anywhere else, it just is. A visitor trying to explain that to a resident without sounding like an asshole is complicated like anyone trying to explain to a blind guy what pink is—the good stuff.
We went to Prague last month. We only stayed eight days which isn't how we're accustom to venturing new cities, we like to stay minimum 30. But we went there to meet my future dog breeder. What we did not expect was to return confidently claiming without a doubt the cleanest, nicest, safest city we've been to amongst all of our travels both stateside and abroad is Prague.
Good luck finding garbage in that photo. Even this next shot of the mostly vacant parking lot across the street from our stay with some overgrown vegetation and construction nearby, find some garbage. I'll wait....
Our plane landed at like 11:45pm so we didn't get to our stay until after midnight. Our driver pointed out a few attractions along the way but what stood out to us the most were the number of ladies outside at that time of night; solo, unaccompanied by anyone, each with handbags over their shoulders and shopping bags in tow doing stuff like withdrawing cash from ATM's unconcerned for safety. As much as I'd love to tell you that's a common occurrence, I won't because as I mentioned in the beginning:
We're not there yet.
We weren't one time approached by a hustler eager to sell meaningless collectibles or persistent tour guides insistent we purchase their two for one hop on/hop off bus ride or anything. No drug dealers, no homeless, no pickpockets, no harassing police, no trouble and no trash. If you haven't had the opportunity to tour much of our globe, one if not all of the aforementioned are common in popular tourist destinations. Not Prague.
Gorgeous city with a lot of history. Delicious food, too, if you like duck and jam, pastries and sweets, or just garden style menu items. Lots to offer.
People are kind too, as are British people, both cultures are real welcoming and hospitable. Safety, however, although England is worlds ahead of Los Angeles, compared to everywhere else we've been, no comparison—Prague sets the bar.
For such a small country with a relatively small population at just 10 million people that hosts millions of tourists annually, they really have their shit together as far as cleanliness. Tough to find trash anywhere on the ground and street sweepers run all day long, even in the rain. Right outside however, not so much—England, Czech. England - England, Czech - Czech. Flap Flap Flap Flap Flap
