A memoir
My boyfriend is in the army. I want to know what he is thinking about, and mostly I wonder if he thinks about me. It’s difficult being here by myself with really no one to talk to!
Sabine
Sabine,
Has it ever happened to you that all of a sudden you had remembered an old friend from the past and few hours/days later that friend contacted you? Well, you are not the only one. It happened to many!
The rule to know if someone is thinking about you is very simple - whenever you think of him and you feel a strong connection (like in a love relationship) then that person feels you.
It works the other way around as well. If you suddenly think about him and feel him then he thinks about you too. But mind you, this rule applies only when you don’t process it with your mind. It comes out of the blue. In other words - it is pointless to think about him all day long in order to “make him” think about you too. In most cases, it will only make you miserable and unhappy.
Why? Because you block his energies to come to you naturally and you burden him with your thoughts.
So, try not to think about him all the time, focus in your NOW moment, and when he calls simply enjoy his company and give him 100% of you.
I also want to address your need to know whether he thinks about you. If you examine closely this need you will realize it fills a gap in you. The knowing, his thoughts, his attention, make you feel good, make you feel loved. This is a classic feeding situation in which you draw energy from the outside, from your boyfriend.
It may work for a short while but rather quickly this type of energy-exchange, this dynamic, will make you miserable.
- Firstly, you will never get enough, as you will become addicted to his energy, and the more he gives the more you will require.
- Secondly, the inner discomfort will grow and make you suffer! The strong wise inner voice within, will tell you: "stop feeding yourself from the outside and begin to find love within." These two voices will create disharmony in your life, you will feel bad about yourself and you will not even know why! Very quickly your judgment and self-loathing will be too painful to bear. The outcome will be the end of your relationship!
Difficult to hear, I know, but better now, before you are in the middle of the chaos.
Good luck with making the best choice for yourself!
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