It's been a week since Mom passed. It doesn't feel like it at all.
I can't say that anything has been on any level of interest for me since then.
I'm kind of surprised I'm writing this right now, in fact.
I can't just let it all go to nothing. Not just blogging, but my world around me in general.
It's weird now, though. After you lose both parents, even if you've long been an adult and established, the world just feels...I don't know...harsher. More raw, like the gloves just came off.
When you're a kid, your parents are your security bubble. They're your shield from the world.
When you grow up, that concept still exists in your mind, so when they're suddenly gone it feels like that shield goes with them. I didn't feel that until I lost the only parent I had left.
Now I'm the shield.
So in order to be a good one, I need to get the hell out of this funk. I need to get back in the swing of things and resume my usual daily routine. Not to forget, but to move on. I probably won't ever be done grieving, but that doesn't mean I need to give up. It doesn't mean I'll never be happy. It doesn't mean I loved them any less. It means that although we may have meant the world to a few close people, we are ultimately insignificant to the universe at large. With or without us, it doesn't slow down. It all goes on, and so must we.
So, after the dust settles in the next few days, expect to see me back to my usual self, writing and reading.
You should begin seeing all my daily projects and my upvotes on other people's posts slowly trickle back to life as I continue to put all the pieces of life back together, and perhaps the mend will be better than how it was originally.
Thank you all for the support for the past couple of weeks, and I'll see you on the inside.
