This morning I went to the neighborhood dollar store to get a few items before a short trip tomorrow. When I collected everything and went to the register, the clerk wasn’t there. A hand bell sat on the counter.
An older gentleman had gotten there before me with a couple bags of chips. He scowled and smacked the bell. In the aisle behind me, I saw the clerk immediately drop the stock she was shelving and make her way toward the counter. The man scowled again and proceeded to smack the bell several times in succession. I could tell by the look on the clerk’s face that she had reached her limit.
At the register, she moved the bell and placed it behind her on a shelf. She said nothing untoward and proceeded to ring up the man’s items. He tossed a wad of bills at her, wearing a dark expression. She remained professional and gave him correct change, after which he jerked the bags off the carousel and stomped toward the door.
I couldn’t stop myself. Really. I almost tried, but didn’t find restraint worth the effort.
“Life’s too short to be that grumpy,” I said with enough volume for him to hear.
He paused at the door, turned, but said nothing. Out he went, everything horrible about life written all over his craggy face.
I shared some sympathetic words with the cashier. Turns out, she was battling an earache and was in significant pain. Still, she had performed all her duties well, including the act of stocking items when no one was at the register. That’s expected of dollar store employees. She wasn’t lax for not being at the register. She was doing her job.
I nursed irritation at the grouchy man until I got into my car to leave. Then it hit me—there’s really no telling what personal battles he faced himself this morning. Certainly life hasn’t treated him the way he’d hoped. I was glad, then, that I hadn’t elaborated on my “life’s too short” remark. I hope it made him think, but I also hope it didn’t cause more damage. We just never know what people are going through.
This brings me to a conclusion that I think is worthy of sharing here. We live in a reactive society. Tempers flare easily and offense is taken when sometimes none is intended. What kind of world would we live in if we were slower to anger, more tolerant of simple human failings and less likely to assign sinister motives? What’s that saying? Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar. Sometimes a bad decision is just a bad decision. I think we do ourselves a disservice by the speed with which we jump to conclusions about people based on a few seconds of ignoble behavior.
I’m not crazy about some of the things I see happening on the blockchain right now. I think some malevolent people definitely operate here, with destructive agendas and sociopathic tendencies. But I think a lot of other people are just doing the best they can. I would love to see us being a little slower to react and more tolerant of human imperfections. We all get it wrong sometimes. I would never defend what the man at the register did this morning. But I’m not sure my response is worth defending, either. I’m just glad I managed to send some positive energy in the clerk’s direction. I hope her day ends a lot better than it started.
