I am having a bad day today, all I want to do is lock myself away from everyone, I am tired and in pain and can't get myself motivated at all. I am singing the song I sing to myself when I am like this, Its just the way I feel.
I hate having Mental-Health problems, I don't need them I don't want them. I have no say I even have no say in when they decide to pop up. One day I could be feeling great the next I can feel my emotions and mood slipping. Keeping my head up as long as I can is usually hard work that wears me out making more tired.
Thankfully Nichola came home early and with hubby back at work I need someone around. I had a lie in trying to stay in bed for as long as possible and hoping I would fall asleep again. Doesn't matter how exhausted I feel if my head if working over time sleep is the last thing I will get and if I am lucky enough to fall asleep the nightmares would wake me up. I was hoping to get into the shower sadly that job was way to much for me at the moment, took me all my energy to get down the stairs then sat on the sofa. I stayed there until hubby came in from work, he made me a cup of coffee and a slice of cake, cake always helps. He then went into the shower, once finished he made me some food, Salmon with Salad, I shared mine with my pups as knew I wouldn't eat it all.
Once the food was finished and cleaned up hubby came out to the garden with me, when I am like this Hubby sticks close to me to give me support. We spent a little time looking at my plants mostly my Sunflowers that always surprise me and help make me smile.
I was disappointed yesterday with one of My Sunflowers, This was a beautiful Red Sunflower but the stalk had snapped, I thought the flower wouldn't open properly so I stuck the stalk back into the soil and gave it a good watering, today I found this beautiful flower.
Its a beautiful flower, I have laid on mu chair hoping the warm weather keeps it open until the seeds are ready for harvesting, I will be really disappointed if I don't get a few seeds from this for next year. I would have liked a few of these as they are so pretty and the Red stands out against the ordinary Golden Sunflowers.
I then took some time checking on the other Sunflowers that are opening, a couple of Red ones, they aren't as bright as the above but still very pretty. The second photo looks like the centre is the shape of a heart. That gives me something to smile about.
I also noticed a small Sunflower, I have never seen a small one before, Its very cute, looks like a baby Sunflower and fits in with my plants. I don't think I am going to get many seeds from this as the centre is tiny, I hope I get a lot more showing up. I am thinking maybe these are the Topolino Sunflowers I planted.
I decided to try a few new Sunflowers as there are a lot more than just the standard Golden Sunflowers. I also have Teddy Bear Sunflowers growing, these look different to all the Sunflowers. This is a Teddy Bear Bud and hopefully they look the same as the second photo.
I will be taking my sorry butt off to bed where I can rest and relax and hopefully pull myself out of this slump. Hopefully Tuesday is a better day.
Thank you for visiting. 💟💟
