Not safe for children. Work, maybe okay. It depends on your workplace.
9 days since my last post. NINE. And this is my off season! What the fuck could be so important?
Maybe you're familiar with the term 'mental health days'. That's basically what I've been doing. For me, a loose definition could be 'bare minimum'. No pressing reason, I don't really need the mental health days. Nothing is driving me crazy or stressing me out. This socially distanced political fireball of a screaming dystopia rather suits me. I've never really liked going out, socializing. Never been a hugger. Now that I'm getting older, apparently I'm allergic to everything so the mask is really helpful for me, all the time. Things couldn't be better.
I'm really just stretching my shiftless and lazy muscles. I've been doing things, just not posts. It's not like I haven't had time. I watched three seasons of The Expanse. That's easily 24 posts worth of wasted time, not to mention my rocket stove could be built by now. So what's going on here, what the hell is my problem? Let's dive into some psychology.
If I'm being honest, part of it is just me not wanting to do it because I set some goals. I wanted to maintain two posts a week throughout my time off, an easily achievable goal. However, I have a natural aversion to people telling me what to do, even me. Who the hell am I to tell me how often I should be posting? Yes, I agree, that's pretty fucking dumb, but there it is.
That's not even the dumbest reason. Another big reason is the rewards system. Do you think I'm going to complain I'm not getting enough rewards? Quite the contrary. If you've been reading my posts (that's my catchphrase), then you will have seen my complaint that I can't trade HIVE, or any of its associated tokens as far as I know, in NY state. Not that I would be trading it anyway, I don't need the money and the 'leveling up' of my account is the only gaming I have time for any more. The problem is, I'm such a contrarian sonofabitch, that since I can't trade these rewards (which I wouldn't trade anyway), the better I do, the more a little bit of me feels like it's a waste of time. And all of you have been showing me such love lately, rewards started coming in pretty regularly. So that asshole deep inside me whispers 'Hey, don't do that thing you enjoy, that you spent a whole summer taking pictures and notes to prepare for! You're only doing 'cause some jerk told you to, and you're not even getting anything out of it! What a sucker!'
Yeah, it's fucked up, but there it is.
Are you wondering what strange confluence of nature and nurture produced such a highly functional, yet obviously deeply disturbed individual? Shit, me too. Stick around, maybe someday I'll hash it out here.
Oh yeah, I fucking LOVE this group. I love a good a rant, even if I'm not the one ranting. I hope someday to reach a beautiful crescendo moment, like Clark Griswold had after getting his dessert of the month Christmas bonus.
And fuck it, since it's just rants, I'm not even going to proofread this sucker. I'm way the fuck behind anyway. Here's a picture, of a bird that was ranting, in silhouette.
