The topic proposed by The Minimalist Community is something that I have an inkling of already. The other day, I was telling a colleague that I got into the job to learn how to have family Sundays.
I am the only child of my mom and as such, it gets really lonely sometimes. What I want is a family of six, that is including me. I want four children. I already know that I'm going to be taking the high road soon. I have the conviction that someday (and by my gut which is crying soon), I would be in the spotlight. How do I keep myself and children on the path of minimalism?
I grew up with nothing and everything. I have a mom who'd rather starve than let me go one day without necessities. I never lacked school supplies, my best Christmas presents were always the clothes she'd take me shopping for and my favorite memories were always tied to my mother somehow. I want a life of fame. I will not deny that. I want to cause a ruckus and change the story of my life. My generation. And I will.
But I have had thoughts consistently on what it'll be like when I achieve this dream of mine. How would I be? Would I still be the same or would it change me like I see on the movies? I do not want to be changed, however, change is dynamic and it comes as it goes. With a new milestone comes new change. We have to change to be able to fit into our new lifestyle and be able to deal with the pressure. But this doesn't mean we have to lose ourselves in the process.
One thing I would like to change is the inability to spoil the ones I love and cherish. To really help when they need me. What I wouldn't want to change is the fact that I value these people over materials. In effect, I have plans in my head. Things I would constantly do to remind myself that there are things that mustn't change.
Go back to my heritage: I had the plan of bringing my children back to Nigeria after I leave for them to never forget. I still do. Only some plans have changed. The last thing I want my kids to have is the mediocre mindset most of our people have. Unfortunately, this mindset has even filtered into the education standard and I can't have my children believing in a lie. I will bring them back to their heritage so they would understand how all the privileges they have came to be, but I will also place them in a position where they are not compromised. This way, I am also teaching myself. So I will never forget.
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They will earn it: one mindset I have seen in the average rich of this land is that they can just spoil their kids because they lacked the privilege. I understand. But in this case, it is just like a man and his dog. The dog gets what he wants when he wants it, never has to use his brain and eventually becomes lazy. What do you think will happen? Its instincts will die because it has everything provided for him. It would lack respect, discipline and loyalty. That is why most rich homes have problematic children. Everything can be solved with money. Well, not in my book. My children will understand the value of money, time and effort. They would learn to value people and most of all themselves. They would be taught the principles of money and they would learn that all they have does not belong to them. It belongs to me. They would learn to work and I will not spare the rod. However, I will also shower them with love and presents. Gifts. I will be a mother and teacher to them.
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Get into the circle: Now, I don't know what the personalities of my children will be. Heck, I don't know what they'll dislike and not. However, a get-away as a family will be nice. I know I love to travel and at some point I'd retire but I'd love to show my children the world. I would want them to see it for themselves so they never have to beg for it or feel left out. In all this, my children are picking up on early Mathematics and understanding the rules of a budget. I will not splurge. I will not waste. And they will learn.
These are a few out of a lot. A woman never reveals all her secrets. When that time comes, I will continue to feed my core. There is this saying that if you can't buy something you really want ten times more after buying it once and not feel a thing, then you should hold off and wait till you can. This is rule I live by. If I am getting something and I know that this thing isn't necessary in my life right now and would only be a liability instead of an asset in the long run, I hold off.
I guess that is why I hardly buy the latest jeans, tops or shoes that my mates do. I can but I don't. There are other things that require my attention. I have enough clothes. I have my needs. The wants can wait. This is a mindset I still want to have seared into me no matter what changes. And like I said, it would remain this way.