You know, there are certain wise sayings in life which we live by, but under certain circumstances, we need to amend. Letting go is one controversial topic that could fit into the category.
In my post, I’m going to be focusing my perspective of letting go on human relationships.
Ideally, I don’t advise people to let go of others(in fact, I advise peopl against it) because I think advice like that could find the wrong person at the right time (or wrong time depending on how you see it) and they might misunderstand. For instance, someone in a relationship can find a meme about how it’s not worth it to “allow someone stress you in a relationsip” just when they’re having relationship struggles with their partner who means well. This has happened to me myself a couple of times when I’ve had relationship drama and the perfect meme about how you should let go of anyone who is x and y and z in a relationship just pops up on my timeline. It’s almost like someone is watching me some times.
(I have this paranoia sometimes that it could be because other apps my girlfriend and I use like TikTok collect information from our chats and send you content suitable to what you might want to see. That would make a lot of sense.)
But hey, everything I’ve said doesn’t mean it’s not ideal to let go some times. Keyword here is sometimes.
In some situations, staying and holding on to people or things really aren’t worth it. Some times you really just need to say “fuck this, I’m out” But before letting go or leaving, you need to make an assessment on whether the other party or thing is probably
There are many reasons I think people can’t let go and I’ll talk about a few of them that come to mind randomly.
Self-esteem and self worth problems
Sometimes people feel like they’re “lucky” to be with their partners. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not wrong feel lucky to be with your partner, but the reasons are what separate people with self-worth problems from people who don’t.
If you feel lucky to be with your partner because they’re a great partner, I think that is totally fine and normal.
But if you feel lucky to be with them because you feel like they’re some kind of prize that you just shouldn’t be able to get normally or afford to lose, you probably have self-esteem problems. And the pill for that, is to…
Know your worth
Before you can say fuck it and leave, you have to know that you deserve better than the way you’re being treated by someone or how something makes you feel. If you don’t know this much, you’ll have no boundaries and you’ll allow anyone or anything happen to you. That connects to my next point as well.
Set boundaries
One thing you need to define from jump in every relationship you enter is boundaries! People are going to walk all over you if you don’t have them, or even if you do have them but can’t enforce them.
Some people just make it a point to keep pushing you and see how far you’ll let them get away with doing to you. Set boundaries, make the boundaries known and clear and stand your ground no matter what against whoever. If someone feels like they can’t respect your boundaries, show em the fucking door. And if you think scaling some of your boundaries for them for just a bit longer hoping they’ll change, I got news for you…
They’re never going to change
This is not to say that people with bad habits don’t change. But your gut knows who will change and who won’t, despite what you might want to lead yourself to belief out of infatuation.
Some people just won’t change no matter what. No matter how good you treat them, how many boundaries or rules you break for them, nothing. When you identify these people, it’s time to hit bye. And if you’re waiting on some special day to end things or say bye…
They’ll be no special “Day”
Your special day is today. Now. Oh you don’t want to break up because their birthday is approaching and that would be so cruel, well, after the birthday, there’s their graduation, and their employment celebration, and X and Y and Z. There’s always going to be a reason to postpone things or push them aside. But you need to do them and you need to do them yesterday.
I could go on and on and on relating points, but it all basically boils down to the fact that even though letting go of loved ones is not an ideal thing to do, some situations require you do just that. Free yourself. Holding on to things that hurt you will fuck with your mental health seriously. I know you know this, so this is merely a reminder. Let go of things of the past to move into a new future. This applies to even abstract things like memories.
I’m not sure if anything I’ve said remotely relates to the theme exactly, but yeah this is what I got. This is my opinion on letting go, why you need to let go, what type of people to let go and when you need to let people go. I hope this helps someone somehow:)
All images used in this post are mine and were taken with my iPhone 11 Pro Max.