I've always been a person who doesn't like to go out, preferring to spend my time in my room, either on my study table or on my bed if I'm weary. I am mostly busy with my computer exploring the virtual world, gathering knowledge, or scrolling through different feeds. Sometimes it would be youtube, sometimes Twitter, or sometimes just wasting time watching memes on Facebook. And every other important day like Eid, New Year Celebration, and other days. I have never actually wanted to go out and enjoy myself with my friends.
Most of the time, it's either my friends or my parents, or, more recently, my girlfriend, who force me to leave the house. It's not as if I don't appreciate other people's company. But it's just a feeling that I don't want to leave the house, as if it's a chore. As I began working remotely, the phenomenon became more prevalent.
This Eid, I'm feeling the same way, and the pouring morning rain made me think it was just as dismal as I was. It's not that I'm unhappy. Alhamdulillah, I'm overjoyed. But the rain seemed to be saying to me, "You are not alone." The silence that followed the rain was soothing. It felt like it was coming to bless everything, with no expectations. I'm growing more stonelike to typical emotional feelings as I get older. I have unassigned duties that I feel it's inevitable. Is anyone else feeling the same way? Is it just me, or does it seem like days pass with each blink, and the tension builds around them? It's like it's never-ending. But it's beautiful. Eid Mubarak Everyone, I wish wherever you guys are; Stay happy and keep a good heart.
