I am about halfway through readjusting my Binance tokens after struggling for several hours connecting to both their application and browser interface, as it kept kicking me out whenever I tried to transfer something. After talking with support, I was able to get it somewhat working from incognito mode in Brave.
It has been a little bit stressful to organize this and I realized how much I was relying on the convenience of the exchange. So far, I have four new wallets that I had to download and trust. Sure, exchanges can't be trusted either, but these wallet apps are so opaque it gets me worried. With so many costs and potential costs coming all of the time, these kinds of amounts would have a significant effect on our current conditions, so losing it would be less than ideal.
Sometimes I fantasize about getting out of crypto and becoming a normal human, a normal husband and father - a person who goes to work each day to earn an average salary, watches some trash on TV, kills hours on a Playstation and lives like the majority - contentedly discontent with life, complaining but making the assumption that this is just the way life is.
I know that sometimes my wife wouldn't mind a husband like that as well, but she also knows that despite the "stress" and all the work I put myself through, I am probably a better person for it. Once in crypto, there is no blue pill to take that can remove the understanding that there is something that can be done, that there is a massive amount of potential and the majority are still blind, so being like them or returning to them will no longer offer the "ignorance is bliss effect" as insulation.
Once seen, it cannot be unseen. Getting out means making an active decision to accept defeat, to no longer try to improve conditions and live by the imposed rules made by the power-hungry to enslave those who value convenience over responsibility, complaining over action.
I think part of the reason that I take this so seriously is that I tend to look long on life and I recognize that these moments are connected to the rest of my life and the rest of my family's life also. And I really do mean moments, because even though I have been working at this for over four and a half years, each day I make multiple decisions to opt-in again and again. It is more than a post, more than a trade - it is getting up off the proverbial couch to do what is necessary or what I can, even when I don't feel like it.
For me, it is like going to the gym, where the going is the hardest part, but once there, the workout not only is easier than it felt it was going to be, it is also far more rewarding and satisfying post-workout.
Post-workout.
It is an exercise, a habit and training and there are consequences to actions. Out of the 4708 posts I have committed to the Hive blockchain so far, not once have I felt bad after posting. I have at times felt terrible before, or lethargic, sick, angry, scared or a million other things - but I click that publish button and I am immediately rewarded with a feeling of completion.
When something takes a long time to build, the feelings of "finishing" can be rare, which is why a lot of people break their work into tasks with small milestone points that give them the feeling of progress. 4708 steps have been made so far in posts, another 44,000 in comments that add up to what has been built so far. It is my work, but it is not a lone venture - thousands of people are involved in many different ways, which is part of what is being built here.
"Getting out" would be undermining what has been accomplished so far and while there is the risk of falling into a sunk-cost fallacy position, I don't think this is the case if considering what is accomplished personally. A lot of people rank theirs' and other's successes based on what is in their wallets, but the journey comes with its own rewards and I think that there are many people who have done a lot of things in their life that they might not have otherwise, because they wanted to deliver great content.
I think that even the incentive of and focus on money that a lot of people see as a negative has meant that many have extended their skills, tried new things, learned more, changed their mindset and increased their personal potential on and off the chain to open up more opportunities in their lives. This is a reward too and I think a lot of people discount the values that do not go directly into a wallet.
I love earning on my writing. It is something that I never thought possible, but the earnings at this stage are not going to change my life long-term, even if they can ease struggles in the short. However, I love that there is the potential for my work to appreciate in value on the backs of thousands of people knowingly and blindly working together in multiple ways to build something that reaches far beyond themselves in in ways they will never see.
As you likely know, I am an idealist and someone who truly believes that things can be better in this world and I can play a small part in helping that happen. While the fantasy of a normal life in the majority can be attractive at times, knowing that in order to have it I would have to willingly give up on my belief that things can be better and live according to the rules of those who are seemingly looking out only for themselves, makes stopping impossible.
I think that this is the problem with the freedom to opt-in, because when you opt into something you truly believe in, there is very little option but to keep going, thick or thin, hardship or glory, reward or cost.
Having a belief is to be a slave. Denying a belief is far harder work and comes with the constant reminder that a lie is being lived. You might want to take the blue pill and forget, but the memory of what could have been will always find a way back to haunt.
Every moment matters. Only the ones to come can still be altered.
Taraz
[ Gen1: Hive ]