We can all agree that the COVID-19 pandemic has somehow struck our sanity. Before, I appreciate solitude and I acknowledge sadness, yet this pandemic has introduced to me the state of “loneliness.”
Unlucky fact: I just turned 18 when the first day of lockdown happened in our country, hehe.
I fell to the pit of unknown emotions and almost gave up!
With the sudden stir of the situation, I was suddenly lost. For a whole year, I am trying to convince myself that I'm not lonely. I was dumbfounded. I've never felt this emotion before. And how unlucky my life was that I had to withstand this puzzlement for a year! In case you don't know, the lockdown/ community quarantine in the Philippines is still ongoing, sighs. So, I had to figure it out myself!
Studying was never hard for me, I loved it, actually. But when the pandemic whacked all of us that made our economy almost fell apart, as if we were close to The Great Depression and the Great Recession, again. I fell, and I was this 🤏 close to giving up. So, I'm really, really, really thankful to the relevant people around me!
Join me as I share how I deal with all the pressures before and after my qualifying exam!
How I cope before my qualifying exam?
Overwhelming support from my fam!
My parents are accustomed that I'm a well-performing student. I never disappointed anyone before in the academic aspect. So, when I told them that I need to take a qualifying exam coz I got a grade lower than 85, I've felt their disappointment. And as I mentioned previously, “Proving my worth to my fam is my kind of game, and disappointments are my game overs.”
But as a child of your parents, you know what's the forbidden technique, right? Before telling the bad news, you have to back up good news, lol. After I told them the quite disappointing news, I announced to them that I'm a President's Lister, acquiring a GWA of 1.32 and 1.23 during the two semesters. That offset their sadness, hehe.
As a way to congratulate me, my parents bought a chocolate cake! And during my review sessions, the house and the refrigerator are full of chocolates and boiled peanuts! Coz according to them, chocolates and boiled peanuts enhance someone's brain performance! And here I am now, finding a way to lose weight and heal all the acne that builds upon my face! Lmao
As shown in the picture, it says “Congrats, Ate!”
Note: In the Philippines, the word “Ate” is how you address an older sister. 😉
Listening to Binaural Beats
Although I'm not sure how this affects my brain stimulation, I felt relaxed and felt more focused while listening to these 7hz and 12hz Binaural Beats. If you have done your research and want to listen to these beats, these are the links for 7hz and 12hz.
Review session with peers
I mentioned on the blogs' Part 1 that if there's one thing I realized during this era of online education, that is, “I cannot succeed on my own.” It was a hard pill to swallow, but it's worth it! I remember when I was virtually reviewing with a friend through the Zoom app, I accidentally slept T^T.
That's a wrap of all the things I did before the qualifying exam. To be honest, before taking the exam, pressure crept up on me. I heard little worries in my brain saying that I'll fail. But thankfully, I passed!
How I cope after my qualifying exam?
I work, work, work, and work
Waiting for the result really upset me, so I had to find ways to kill every minute of my time. I attended several interviews for internships and discovery calls from clients! I also made an account on onlinejobs.ph and sent several work applications. Some replied but sadly, I was not able to work with them because I lack experience. Regardless, I still updated my resume, cover letters, and portfolio that could be beneficial for future purposes.
I took all my time to learn different marketing lessons. I enhanced my knowledge about Social Media Marketing, SEO, email outreaching, B2B lead generation, and many more! All of these just to kill my time, hehe. I don't wanna spend my time worrying about my test result, that if released, cannot be changed. I turn my worries into opportunities to learn!
I rather spend my time eating so much knowledge rather than being pessimistic. Because realistically speaking, if I happen not to pass, I'm obliged to find a private school where tuition fees are sooo high coz no public school will accept me as a transferee unless I would start from being a 1st-year college again. That's why I studied Marketing so that I can use them to find part-time jobs, where my salary can be used to pay my future tuition fees if I transfer to a private school, hehe.
But it's a good thing I passed!
A café date with friends
Among my circle of friends, three of us are in the same course; BSA. So when the result came out, we are happy to celebrate here because all three of us passed the qualifying exam!
During those days of waiting, my friends were in bad shape too! They have their worries that need to be addressed. So, a café date with the girlies happened! All of their boyfriends were not allowed to join coz one of our friends was in a state of healing from a recent break-up. More details of the café date will be on the next blog!
In case you are having a bad day and you need help on some realizations, here are my takeaways from the situations I've been in recently.
1. I enjoy solitude, but I need to be with people, sometimes.
2. It takes a lot of strength, patience, and open-mindedness to acknowledge loneliness and any unknown emotion. Please take your time acknowledging and understanding them! It is when you understand a situation that you can already open a path to a solution.
3. I will never underestimate nor overestimate myself and the people around me, again!
4. I'll seek help whenever I cannot carry all the burden, may it be from a professional or my social network.
Please be noted that every person is different. Our emotions are relative due to the different secretion levels of our hormones. What works for me might not work for you! What's happiness for me might not be happiness for you. If you are having a hard time and it negatively consumes a lot of your energy, please seek help from a professional if you have the means to.
If you've reached here, can you message someone who you think needs help? Some person already shows the sign that they need help, yet fail to verbalize it because of low self-esteem and pressure. Be kind, everyone! Please remember that every single day, we'll encounter someone who has a bad day, and we might be the key to uplift them by doing the smallest things we could do! As always, have a great day!
For the reference of Part 1, you can read I passed my qualifying exam! | Here's how I did it
All are still blurry for her now, and she knows she has a lot more to learn. Please educate & share information with her when she overlooks a few things. 🤍 An open-ended person | A book that is yet to close | She likes to share a few, you might say she tells everything but trust me, she reserves a few for herself 😉 If you like her writing, could you tell her, please? She has been longing for appreciation for quite some time.
A young individual with a vision of leading the future industry, has a willingness to transform 'experience' to 'expertise.' She wants to achieve everything, yet she lacks confidence.