If one is master of one thing and understands one thing well, one has at the same time, insight into and understanding of many things.
~Vincent Van Gogh
The older I've gotten and put alot of multi-dimensional work into alot of different things (including myself), the more I've seen the truth in this.
Going deeper into the realm of music production has provided profound glimpses into the architecture of life and the universe itself. The more refined my senses have become to the subtle details within musical compositions, the more I've been able to see through the "codes to the matrix" with increasing clarity.
And interestingly, the time I'd spent - or perhaps invested in - surfing while living in Bali provided an immense amount of insight into the creative process itself, as I'd written previously in the piece, Wisdom Of The Surf.
Navigating the musical processes have not been an easy road. There'd be no way to count the number of times I've overloaded and short-circuited my nervous system trying to immaturely push with an excess of creative energy against the current of my body's rhythms. Discovering the metaphors surfing granted - attuning to the tides and waves of inspiration, knowing when to paddle in, etc - provided a fantastic context for completely upgrading my relationship with producing to find/create greater harmony in its processes.
And here, now, returning back to the studio after a couple months in the mountains biking, I've been facing alot of the same old dilemmas.
Not wanting to wait indefinitely for some inspiration that may never arrive - and acknowledging the perspective some have offered that inspiration is to be found in the work itself - I've questioned whether waiting for the waves to roll in has merely become a convenient excuse for procrastination. And it's been a constant conflict, so often bumping into the same obstructions when trying to push myself into producing when not feeling it 100%. Nonetheless, I've been getting fucking bored of waiting and realize it's a responsibility to rework my approach to the whole process if it hasn't been working well.
Then, this morning, something dawns on me.
(Perhaps it was the microdose kicking in.)
Just as I'd found incredibly powerful insight in converting the skills of surfing into the creative processes, what if what I'd spent the last couple months cultivating with mountain biking skills could also convert over into the realm of music production to help move through my persistent challenges?
It's been fascinating, coming back to Edmonton to ride the same trails I started off on this season, seeing such a stark contrast of how much better shape I've gotten in after riding three hours a day, six days a week, for the last couple months...
While the overall sense of strength has increased alot, it becomes most noticable in the short, punchy climbs that used to quickly exhaust me. Where I'd end up getting off the bike and hiking before, I can now push through to get up them, no sweat. Though whether looking at these type of small moments or measuring my progress with longer, sustained climbs, it's clear that there's one skill in particular that has been at root of these advancements:
Energy conservation.
While the concept had most prominently come to mind the times I'd been microdosing while biking, the whole summer had been an extended practice as spending more than half the time climbing.
Frankly, I tend to have a dislike for most climbs. Granted, there are the occasional climb trails built to sheer perfection which make the ascents far more enjoyable and less taxing. Though with the majority, it kinda sucks to exhaust oneself going uphill - albeit a necessity to access the sweet, sweet downhill flow.
Being in less-great shape than I used to be a couple decades ago, I've tended to take the climbs slow and steady - in as high(?) gear as possible, pacing myself to expend as little energy as possible. While there have been guys ripping it up way faster than myself, I've tended to take the climbs as more of a marathon approach than a sprint - conserving my energy to ensure enough for a solid ride down.
And there are finer details to this...
Intuiting just how much force to give it on steeper grades, depending how long a stretch it is. Adjusting according to how firm or loose the ground it. Riding uphill at an angle rather than straight up, should it be a steeper forest road up. Planning out different routes up that require a lower expenditure of energy, if available. Etc, etc.
While the flowy descents are what make it all worthwhile, there's a precision in these varied approaches to the uphills that can make a huge difference in energy conservation.
And I dunno why it was only today, that I ever thought about music production in the same context.
Sparked into action a few days ago by a request from an old friend who DJs deep house for a couple sets, I figured producing some original stuff would be more fitting. So... new project.
It's been sounding dope.
Though, going slllllooooowwwwww.
So slow, that's it's been incredibly tempting to lose motivation and get discouraged. This is not new.
These types of creative battles are the type of shit that have peaked my neuroses and sabotaged my progress time and time again. There's been no shortage of new projects started, only to end up going nowhere as the momentum halts when my desire to move faster than the project itself evolves hits walls.
Sometimes it feels like I'm half-retarded, incapable of willfully completing projects and advancing great starts beyond basic loops. Yet, there's also some wisdom in the outlook that you can't rush a creative venture - that each project must be given the adequate time & space to blossom according to its own timeline, the same way you can't force a baby out of the womb without serious debilitation or death. The middle ground between that driven, goal-oriented hustle to be "productive" and allowing the process to flow organically has been incredibly challenging to find.
And then... microdose. Contemplation.
What if the same principles of energy conservation I've been exploring & practicing with mountain biking might apply just as equally in the realm of music production?
What if I've been hitting frustration with these points in producing only because I've been pushing too hard, too fast, when the appropriate approach might be the same type of slow, sustainable pace I've adopted in my bike climbs that have enabled the persistence to ascend peaks with the full capacity to charge hard on the descent and maximize the enjoyment on both?
What might it look like, approaching music production similarly to mountain biking?
Acknowledging - as per the yin & yang in all of life - there are the hard climbs up and exhilarating rides down, taking the tougher parts as slow as needed to conserve the energy to complete the entire trail/track with ease & enjoyment.
Aware that there may be multiple routes uphill, some of which may be far more enjoyable than others - and that the free-flowing descents may be magnitudes more fun, having conserved the energy in the harder parts to extend the experience of harmony throughout the entire ride.
Yeah, the grudgery of the slower parts of the production process may seem tedious and tiring at times. *What if I've been shooting myself in the foot by failing to pace it through this phase and conserving energy properly for the easier, funner parts? **What if I could build a 'climbing trail' that made them far more fun? ***
What if - just as with mountain biking, months of practice has refined my muscle memory and build the strength to increase performance - continuous persistence with music production may develop my capacity for persisting through the tougher parts and increasing overall skill to ascend in mastery with greater satisfaction?
🤷♂️
“The beginning is perhaps more difficult than anything else, but keep heart, it will turn out all right.”
“It is looking at things for a long time that ripens you and gives you a deeper meaning.”
“Great things are not done by impulse, but by a series of small things brought together.”
~ Vincent van Gogh
For whatever reason, I felt compelled to find more van Goh quotes to wrap this up with... and perhaps it was these two, I was guided to for the purpose of driving this home for myself, at the least.
Maybe these humps I've hit with musical projects are natural - merely the token resistance to get over with practice and persistence.
Perhaps in those phases of working slowly on repetitive loops, there is the opportunity to refine both the works and skill- finding that "deeper meaning" and more intimate connection into the subtle magic of the moment, equally in the realm of music as that of mountain biking the same trails over and over again, finding simple pleasure in the incremental improvements and blissful rides each run through.
And for a final twist, that not even I foresaw coming...
“There is nothing more truly artistic than to love people.” Vincent Van Gogh
Perhaps while I've been overly wrapped up all these years in material goals and my own aspirations - musical and otherwise...
I've missed the mark, attempting to prove myself through some tangible artistic work - when as van Gogh hints at, the most impactful thing (even if intangible and never reaping external acknowledgement) is that of simply loving people.
Perhaps in the midst of the midst of this plandemic, my concerns over doing something "epic" musically or literarily really don't fucking matter so much when measured side-by-side up to my core attitude towards our fellow human beings. Perhaps my frustrating views of the majority as "muggles with their muzzles" has been the trap - versus expanding my own perceptions to patiently accomodate, with gratitude, the ascension process all others on this planet are going through on their own timelines.
And here, perhaps it's not so much a matter of energy conservation, so much as it is that of energy production...
Conservation, being a necessity in a paradigm where energy is limited. Versus, a totally different dimension in which the energy of love is itself an abundant source to draw upon for heart & soul-driven acts of service for mankind.
Granted, the aspects of our bodies that may still reside in 3D might require the management of that energy within the boundaries of time & space - the practice of conservation still key to utilzing it effectively & productively.
Though, perhaps so long as we're overly focused on our own gains and goals, we've disconnected from that abundant source of energy available via the frequency of love for others - which may consistently serve as the fuel for all acts of passion intended as gifts for others' elevation of consciousness.
Or some shit.
Maybe I've just had an Irish whiskey too many, rambling on a bit too long here.
As usual... maybe we each experience our own truths, whether this be an accurate, resonating reflection of or not.
😎🍻💖
