-“Money is not the reason why i’m here”, said Derek, while pointing his gun towards the pharmacist. He was shocked, fumbled:
-What! What do you want then? Opioids?
-No no, i was just kidding, i want the money, all of it.
What was that? Who the fuck would make a joke during a robbery?, said Derek to himself. It was for sure now, he didn’t know who he was anymore.
Pharmacist picked up to sack from the counter, opened up to register started to collect the money. He was a charming old man and he clearly didn’t deserve what was happening to him.
“No!” said Derek, as the pharmacist started to put the money in the sack, “i just need coins!”
Pharmacist looked at Derek, as he seemed like he didn’t understood one word Derek said.
“Just put the coins, i don’t want any banknotes.”
Pharmacist surprised, said “Why?”.
Derek sighed, said “Look, i really don’t have a time to explation to you right now, just put the coins and let me get the fuck out of here.”
Pharmacist was clearly relifed when he heard that.
-But you said you want all the money...
-Yes?..
-But now, you just want coins.
-Yes, i want all the coins.
-But wouldn’t it be faster if you just said “i want just the coins”?
Derek thought about this for a few seconds. And said;
-Ok, you are right. Sorry for the inconvenience.
Pharmacist grinned for a glimpse of a second, then started the put coins in the bag. Derek was pensive; he watched to pharmacist putting coins in the bag for a while, which wasn’t much, then said:
-Hey, do you know where can i find the most coins?
Pharmacist thought about this for a while, said:
-Did you try the vending machines?
Of course, that was brilliant. Derek couldn’t hold his enthusiasm.
-Yeah, yeah! That was great! Thanks a lot!
“No problem” said pharmacist, as he gave the bag to the Derek. Derek took the bag, said “Thanks again!” and left the pharmacy.
It was a quiet afternoon on a suburban street. He walked couple a meters to his vintage car, saw Marie, still sitting on the front seat. He jumped into the car and started driving, without saying a single word. Marie was looking at him. Said;
-What was that?
-What? I did what i had to do, it wasn’t personal.
Marie started to laugh;
-Oh my god! You’re obsessed, you know that right?
-I’m not obsessed.
-You can’t let things go! You’re obsessed, you know that right? Deep down, you know that is right!
-I’m not! What am i obsessed with so much?
-Dude, you can’t even let me go! I’m dead! Look at me, you know that i passed away right?! You’ve been to my funeral, remember?
-I know but that’s not obsession! I just missed talking to you and you’re here, that’s it.
-Oh, please don’t justify this now like it’s a fucking fairy tale, you know there is no healthy way of explaining this!
-OK! Shut up, it will stop, i will stop, just shut up!
-How are you planning to stop this exacly? By doing absolutely nothing about it?
-No, i’m doing something about it! I have a plan, don’t worry...
-You have a plan? What is the plan?
-I’ll have a revenge. It all started with one a particular incident. Do you remember the coin incident?
-Coin incident? We have a incident of coin?
-You don’t remember? It was our 10th week, we went to the hotel next to the countryside.
-We only dated 5 months but go on.
-Yeah, anyway. We stayed for 3 days, the bill was 180. I gave a banknote of 500 and they didn’t have any banknotes for change because the county was changing the currency at that time, and the bank came over and took all of their money to change them with new banknotes. Remember? They paid the change, 320, with coins! They didn’t accept my offer to come later and get banknotes for change. Remember now?
-Yeah, i remember.
-Yeah...
-Fuck, yeah but what is this have to do with it?
-It all started there. I was furious. I never felt that furious before that in my life. I was so furious that i could feel that somethings were shifting inside my brain. That’s why! So, i’m going to have a revenge now, and try to find some peace.
-Yeah...Because they mocked you in high school, right? You always had coins, you never got any banknotes from your parent for some reason for a while, remember? They mocked you because on your way to the cafeteria, you sounded like a farm animal. Like a sheep, or a cow. Yeah, i remember...
-It doesn’t matter. What matters is i’m going to get my revenge. I going to stay there for 8 days in the best suit, the bill will be 960, after i got enough coins, i will separate each one and weight them to see how much it’s costs exacly. Then i’m going to shuffle all the coins in the bags and going to pay them with a mixed coins! They will have to count every single penny!
-So you’re robbing places for coins?
-Pieces coming together, right?
-But why don’t you just rob the vending machine then?