@galenkp ; What have you tried but given up on in life? Explain it, why you gave up and how you would have gained from it, and what you lost by not following through.
There is a limit to the amount of misery and disarray you will put up with, for love, just as there is a limit to the amount of mess you can stand around a house. You can't know the limit beforehand, but you will know when you've reached it.
~Alice Monroe
Answer.: You know, one long away day eventually comes one day, and you are so exhausted, knowing that you have done everything in the name of love and then you are sitting by, and watching all your efforts go to waste, because the other person doesn't have the sense of value, to appreciate and reciprocate.
It did happen to me! Just one day, I looked at my very very exhausted self and said, "This is where you draw the curtain baby, you have tried so hard but it's not f**king working".
I gave up on one relationship that really mattered so much to me, the one I really tried desperately, to make work, yes I honestly did try! I fought until I didn't see the need to, anymore.
I was brought up in an environment where the marital union was/is regarded as sacrosanct and therefore not to be toyed with. Zestfully, I started the journey, trudging along at some point until I could no longer move an inch further, without causing myself more harm.
People say if you truly love someone, you cannot fathom giving up on them? And if you give up, you didn't truly love..
When someone first gives up on you, what choices do you have left? None! I just picked up the battered pieces of my life and moved on, choosing to love myself inspite of the ache and the emptiness and the longing. It has remained one of the most painful losses, for me, with healing, a very slow and painful process as well.
But thank God for the kids who gave me every reason to keep living and to keep loving myself.
Can you fathom a situation where you consistently suffer betrayal and abuse, from the other side, consequently leading to a damage of self esteem? Would you let yourself be at the receiving end over and over, all in the name of staying true?
If your answer is a "yes", then you never truly loved yourself.
It was all up to me to reflect on the dynamics of the relationship, putting it all up on a scale, to ponder on how healthy and fulfilling it had been for me. When all the negatives eventually played out, I discovered, albeit, painfully, that letting go and walking away was a positive step, in the right direction.
I and my kids missed out on the chance for that deep emotional bond that could have existed between husband/wife, father/children and as a complete family. Yes I missed out on a journey meant for two, going it alone, I missed out on the joys of building a life together with the man I loved solidly by my side and so much more.
My kids missed out on "Daddy". He was never there, didn't ever bother... You earn a Dad by being there for your kids, not just for making babies yeah.
But no regrets! I provided love, support and stability for my children, to mitigate the effect of an absentee father, and I'm happy at who they have become. Me? Walking away was one of the best decisions I ever made, he was the one that gave up before I ever did!
The photo is mine (of my son and his girlfriend 😊).
Thank you @galenkp for this initiative.
I am @edith-4angelseu and thank you for stopping by my neighbourhood.