"Un-PAYING" The Debt You Owe

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Some days ago, one of my former students texted me on Facebook, at first I was very skeptical of replying because most times when people who hadn't texted in two to three years suddenly text, originally this should be a good thing, it might mean they remember you, they care for you, or they probably have you in their mind and they just haven't found the time to text you.

This is understandable

But on second thought, it could mean that they're caught up in a serious financial mess and had no option but to text you.

In reality, being in a financial mess makes people do the unthinkable

It's nature to be seek help even in unconventional places

It takes away their conscience. If it was possible, they could even go to people they're not friends with, or people who they're affiliated with but never shared any form of closeness, just to get the money to take care of their problems.

This lady was a good student of mine. Back in the day, she had a rough life, a deadbeat mum, and she was struggling to pay her way through school. She did a lot of menial jobs to survive, and she was the brightest person I know academy.

It was crazy, students who had the tools to succeed never had the brain or seriousness to excel, but back then, she only need the right investment and she could have become the star she was meant to be.

Unfortunately, it wasn't meant to be.

After 11 years, it's understandable if she texts me for financial assistance, I wasn't scared of helping her, back in the day, I helped her in the little ways I can because I couldn't relate to her situation.

I was also not in a good financial place back in the day, but her situation was incomparable. When I saw her text a few days, I was scared of saying "I'm broke".

She wasn't someone I could say"no" to, that was if she needed that help. Nevertheless, I was angry at my financial situation. It's not like she was going to get angry if I said I didn't have it, but it'll hurt me, for not having it at that particular time.

Mentally Alert: Intent Matters A Lot

In reality, I'm conditioned to always judge the intent behind people texting after they hadn't done so in a long time. It's mostly "money issues", most times I ignore people as such.

However, this was a girl I had a history with. I didn't expect her to always text, she's now in her early 20s and has to hustle to take care of herself. However, she wasn't texting because she needed help, she texted because she felt she had to appreciate me for all the times I was there for in the past.

This was a different outcome. Although in 11 years, her life would have changed. She might have encountered some good fortune and things would have been better, but then, I wasn't sure.

I'm conditioned to always be the giver,

so in any situation, I already see myself as the one who should give, I don't bother about not getting back and this isn't because I don't want to be given, it's because I have set my mind to never get back, I feel the universe has a way of rewarding good deeds, this creates a consolation, especially when I do give and the people in question never appreciate it or even see any need to.

However, this girl owed me nothing, whatever I did for her, I might have forgotten, but she held it close to her heart, and, after 11 years she sent me quite a substantial amount of money in appreciation.

It felt bizarre because the last time I check my bank notification, the last 50 to 100 transactions were always outgoing and nothing incoming

Nevertheless, I had to tell her to consider the economic situation of the country, I felt this might dissuade her a little. I didn't want to reject a gift, and I didn't know her financial situation, what if she sent her income for the week?

However, I had to clear my mind and accept that gift. Sincerely I couldn't place my hand on what I categorically did for her, maybe if I did, the gift would feel deserved but I didn't.

Apparently, people are the ones who define deeds and determine if they want to attach any form of specialty to them. In this situation she probably held it to heart, it'll be painful if she came for financial assistance and I wasn't able to offer.

I still don't know her financial situation, so I still feel guilty, it's going to be an awkward thing to ask.


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When I talk to people I try not to ask them how well they're doing financially, it might create the wrong impression, rather I ask them about their health, and their well-being in general


A "Money" Situation Creates Mixed Feelings

On the bright side, I am happy that someone remembered me. The economic situation in Nigeria is beyond terrible, so I do not have any expectations from anybody.

However, I woke up with a decent amount of money in my account, from someone who I never expected to, and I still can't shake off the feeling that that money might be her a decent amount of her weekly income.



Interested in some more of my works



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How To Find The Next "BIG" Meme Coin
Personal Finance: Achieving Intentional "Saving" Goals
Playing The Survival Game: Human Nature In Introspection

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