The COMedy Rumble - No Direction Comedy

What you're about to read is a combination of rib cracking jokes but take warning... It has no direction, just find a way to flow with it somehow.


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I hate being the playful type so I always try to plan how I spend my life time, make good decisions and be sure to follow plans to succeed in life. But anytime I relax to do the planning, the light comes up and off I go to turn on my favourite channel.

This has been happening for all the days of my life. I just hope I get to have that plan later today if Nepa (light) will not suspend it again.

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Ladies, let's discuss this please... How do you sleep on the first night after braiding your hair? Because the last braid I did, my eyes were like bright torch light and my forehead could produce light to a dark room.

And I don't know what strong mind I do have to lie down with the hope of sleeping. Somehow, my eyes are just opened, tears are letting lose on their own and I feel like someone keeps giving me knocks on the head... Why does that happen ladies?

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Let me ask, Are you one of those that trusted your dreams? I did and I still regret I did that. I had slept after eating a very nice meal with lots of my favourite juice. My night was so good that it was like I was in paradise, I wore a new cloth and was singing beautiful songs. But I felt like I needed to relieve myself in the toilet.

What a classic toilet! I thought and I let lose all the liquid in my bladder with a sigh of relief. My dad woke me up with a cane, I was swimming on my bed with my urine.

So there is this guy in my neighborhood who is well known for his small hustling skills until he started cybercrime (yahoo yahoo) and as soon as he got a client that promised to pay a huge amount of money, he promised to roof his church building.

The client blocked him an hour to payment time, my neighbour has converted to a Muslim as we speak.

I don't know how many of us have thought of this but as Christians, let's reason this issue. Instead of God to just destroy the devil and let us humans live in peace and serve him all the days of our lives free from sins, He killed his only Son.

Is this story clear at all? Let me take a sip of my fearless drink.

My neighbour would always scold his son and compare him with another neighbor's son who was doing well. He did it all the time especially when his son does something wrong. A few weeks later, the neighbor with the well to do son died and it was later discovered that his son used him for rituals to make money.

Since then, my neighbour have been begging his son whom he always compared with others, to be himself no matter what.

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I finally made an update on my twitter account to make it public by saying "Ken and I are no longer dating" and Ken made a comment under it saying "Babe, that's a horrible way of telling people we are married".

Please where exactly was I wrong in my status update? Tell me and give me the correct sentence to use, I'll go and edit it if yours is better.

I'm yet to understand what my lecturer was teaching about the importance of sleep in the video he sent to us and I've been watching the video over and over at 3am for almost a month now.

Please can you explain it to me, I want to pass my exams...


This is my entry to The COMedy Rumble I'm inviting @funshee and @otuyanancy to participate in it too.

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