One day, I was bored and decided to explore around my house when I found some money on the floor.
It wasn’t anything that would have made me Elon Musk, but it was free money, and even though, it was less than a dollar, I imagined all the things I could get with it.
It might sound crazy when I say “all the things” but, if you are Nigerian, you would understand that a dollar is worth so much here and with the way our economy is going, I think very soon, we might be able to buy cars with a dollar.
Anyways, I began planning about what I would get with the money, however, I was scared to pick it up because, well, in Nigeria, when people pick up money that isn’t there’s, they either are said to turn into yams or a goat and while life would be easier as a goat, I didn’t want to take chances.
At that point, I contemplated walking away without the money, but, after taking a few steps, I began considering how delicious noodles would be, and trust my stomach to always win.
Going back to where I found the money, I decided to try a few things that people would say to do if you ever found money on the floor, hoping that I could escape spending my life as a yam.
Step one: Find someone to pee on the money, preferably a small child and this might sound disgusting but, I didn’t care.
I found my nephew and had to strike a deal that I would give him some of my noodles, and he did the needful.
Step two: Buy a cain and flog the money, just in case there is an evil spirit in it.
To do this, I had to send my nephew to my neighbors to get a cain on credit because I planned on using the money to pay.
Step three: dance around the money.
I don’t know what this did or didn’t do, but I danced like never before; I would have inserted a video of me dancing but I don't want y'all blind, well, after doing this, I picked up the money, rinsed it with water, and let it dry.
I was so excited while waiting for it to dry, and I decided that I would add another dollar to it which was my last money so that we could buy drinks also, but when I went to my pocket it was empty and there was a hole.
Immediately after realizing that, it hit me that I had been acting like a fool for money that belonged to me and I didn’t only act a fool but, I was now owing to my neighbor and my nephew.
I still got the noodles but, trust me when I say that it wasn’t as nice as I thought it would be in the end.
