How to not save any money - pro guide



So, you hit the big 30 and people expect you to have a house, a mortgage, a loving spouse, a child, and a life.

But all you have is a stolen Netflix password, overdue rent payments, a money-loving landlord, a beer belly and a have eaten chiclet that may or not be your lost tooth from 1996.

The first step to not saving money is by not getting a job of your dreams, instead settling for whoever takes you.

Then, on the bright side, you can move out of your parents' place to a room with possible 4 walls and hopefully a roof. You splurge and go for the whole package - 4 walls, roof, and a window. NO MONEY SAVED.

It is during this time that you realize that bread, milk, and eggs which were found so freely in your parents' fridge are not free.
You step into a supermarket and squint your eyes to read the prices, shudder and just buy bread and butter. But your eyes linger on the beer aisle, then having succumbed you search for appropriate snacks. NO MONEY SAVED.

Then this buddy of yours tells you about hahatoken, it's the next dogecoin. You confidently dump your next month's rent whilst dodging your landlord like a ninja. If your cold concrete floor was covered by a rug, it would have been pulled from beneath your feet. Your investment has sunk and NOW YOU'RE IN DEBT.

Maybe, some retail therapy will cheer you up, but you have no money. You see the amazing pay later offer and really take it to heart. You might not be crushing it, but your debt is.

Then you feel the need for romance because you can’t handle this cruel world on your own. You zhuzh yourself up in more clothes, spring for expensive dates, only to find yourself ghosted. Then you get the premium version and that's your chance to say goodbye to more money. You might be crushing on someone in a dating app, but debt is crushing on you.

Pandemic, economic recession, automation of your job, some evil villain comes and takes away the job that you hated.

Alas, debt-ridden and chased out by your landlord, you go back to your parents, but your room is now a cross between a man-cave and a yoga studio. Your parents send you to the basement.

Wait, a few months later you get a new job. REPEAT but with MORE INTEREST.

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