The Comedy Open Mic Contest - A Stingy Man


Jonathon Burton

A Stingy Man

Ben is a stingy man and has been known all over the places and the town around. He is a rich man but stingy to himself and to everyone. His children always feel hungry and it will take him time to pay his children's school fees. His wife on the other hand is someone who does give freely. She has a passion for giving to people, unlike her husband.

One fateful day, the Community he lived in wanted to have their carnival where the youths in the area had to move from door to door collecting money from those in the area. All the houses they went to gave them a tangible amount of money. They only had a few left for their money to be completed. One of them is a relative to Mr Ben and knows Mr Ben's character to the fullest. The whole youth decided to visit him since he was around. He did not have any way to give excuses..

The youths had to give it a try to meet up with him to see if he would give them something tangible. Ben happened to be the richest in the community. The youths later went to his house but luckily met him at home. Ben promised them to come back in the evening and that he is going to give them something tangible. The youths were very happy and poured out sweet names to him. The youths called him good names and hailed him to the fullest. Some of them said, he will give them what they wanted while some of the youths concluded that he is not giving them more than his power. They said he only said they should come back otherwise, he is going to give them just a little.

Getting to the evening time, all the youths gathered again to meet up with him. They went to his place and this time he was absent and they met his wife and children. The youth asked "where is your dad? The children responded, "he has gone out". One of the youths said "but I saw him not too long ago". The children responded, "yes but it was not too long he went out". Ok… then tell him we will be back in some hours from now.

They left but not too far waiting for him to come back. To their surprise, they saw him at the door side standing busy gazing at his phone. The youths who were left behind were surprised, for Mr Ben had told them lies. Without hesitation, they quickly went to him and greeted him "good evening Sir". He responded "how are you?". Fine Sir. The youths in oneness answered him. Mr Ben quickly rushed to his room to bring the envelope which he had packaged the promise he gave to them. He handed it over to the head of the youths. They were very happy to have received such a package as the envelope was heavy.

They were thinking the package would be a huge amount of money. Wow...finally Mr Ben has given us a huge amount of money, some of them said. After opening the envelope, they were all short of words. This is not good… why on Earth must he behave this way? This is truly the kind of person he is. He just displayed who he is. When the amount was disclosed, it was just fifty pieces of twenty naira notes making a thousand naira ($2).

Hahahaha...they thought something tangible was inside the envelope... hehehehehe…. So funny….

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