Taking back Control

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I feel inspired

I've started a new morning routine, and I'll try sticking to it to see how it affects my energy, motivations and creativity.
I finished a workout, Chloe Ting's 2 week challenges, as best as I could without hopefully hurting my muscles badly, but I know the way to strengthen them is by constantly tearing them. When it's too much, I take a break or do an easier exercise instead.

Sunday was my third day of no social media and it was certainly difficult, but finally felt easier. Probably because I know I'll go back to it Monday. I cheated a bit and peaked a few times for less than a minute. I was rather irritable and nervous the first 2 days, but today feel way calmer. I haven't exactly been more productive, but I got enough done. I certainly had a lot of fun, watched the Queen's gambit, Mandalorian and his dark materials and I played Textorcist (pg 18 typing game, really fun and challenging).

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Queen's Gambit is an awesome show; it's really empowering and I love how the character goes through a huge transformation. There are many very touching scenes, that elicit emotions. She's far from perfect, but it's hard to blame her, as she went through a lot.
The power trips are certainly fun, where she nonchalantly proves wrong people who doubt her. I particularly admire how unapologetic she is about her success, and that's something I want to learn from. She doesn't downplay her accomplishments to others especially.

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(Illustration from The Strange Library)

I reread The Strange Library by Murakami. Personally the illustrations really make the book memorable and set the atmosphere, but also it's short enough to reread easily. The following is my interpretation. The books constantly uses strong foreshadowing. Even the first page includes a quick summary of the story to create tension. The story shows that adults can be wrong and that always behaving properly at the expense of ourselves isn't the right answer. It shows how guilt and shame can be easily used to manipulate us. Learning to say "no" can be a matter of life and death. Surprising amount of positivity, I guess typical for a child.

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I'm planning on taking every weekend off instead of just Sunday and using less social media in general, I'll still use direct messaging, but I'll avoid checking random notifications. In fact from the sneak peeks, I'm starting to feel anxious about catching up with everything, instead of excited as I normally get with a few notifications. This is good in a way, the addiction is hopefully wearing off.

I haven't managed to be more mindful than maybe a minute at a time, probably less. Which is a shame because I worked really hard on that months earlier, so I'm basically starting over. Today is a bit better, but I clearly need more breaks. My head is buzzing with too many thoughts and ideas, which is partially why I'm writing them down. I used to write "Brain Dumps" regularly, but I've been inconsistent this month. Also I've been listening to Katty Arrington's podcast. Link: https://anchor.fm/katy-arrington

(Another cool new art podcast I listened to: https://open.spotify.com/episode/5feAD8tHKeo86WVB0XNorz?si=Kiox4W20Qvi0Qujc5njL8Q Art Art Art)

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I like how she calls them Brain Downloads, so I'll probably use that word from now on. I agree with her that a lot of self help books are more feel good books, personally I felt biggest progress and changes from Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT), which includes various exercises to work on yourself. Another book that I found helpful was 7 Habits of Highly successful people which I read when I was ~17, it was one of my first self help books.

I want to do a weekly progress diary as I love posting here and I wanted to be more consistently. I'll write bits throughout the week and make a post on Mondays. I'll share my art process steps pictures, but the mindset is more important, because then you can apply it to your style of art.


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Last week I published my first animated video, Control. The music is my Jokreg

The video was a challenge as I had to learn how to use Open toonz (awesome free animation program) and how to export it (I used Pinnacle 23, don't recommend it), and handbrake to compress it for tokenizing.

I've been working on the video most of the month, bit by bit, brainstorming ideas, and after the first week I decided to shift the video into social media theme, not necessarily cyberpunk. The video is a lot of work, so I wanted it to be important and to have an impact in some way. I've watched Social Dilema, Netflix documentary, highly recommend, and it made me realize how different social media used to be. I used to be hard on myself for not resisting is as well as before, but the documentary made me realize that it's not my fault that it's more addicting than it used to be. I love socializing online, but I've always been quite antisocial, so it's energy draining even if it's fun. Instead of socials, I've called my family remembers more this week and I want to keep that up.

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Making a music video has been on my "bucket list, (I never liked the word, but I don't know a better one), and I'm happy I finally made one. I was certainly nervous about it, which is why I took a break from socials. To reflect, to not obsess as much and to consider what is my next big goal.

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Thank you for reading <33

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