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The importance of our mindset, a little story

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I would like to share a little story with you about something that I consider very important in life in general.

My son is 11 years old and he has been playing football for several years. At the moment, he is in a team where he is the youngest. At this age, being a year younger can mean that you are 20 cm smaller and 20 kilos lighter than some people you play against. Therefore, the coach doesn't let him play often during the games. It's never easy not to play and sit on the bench for almost the whole match. My son was often annoyed and then when the coach gave him 10 minutes to play, he was so angry for not having played more, that he didn't have motivation to play well. He lost the ball often, didn't run much and hardly was part of the team.

Once, when it was bed time, I told him that I understand his frustration but that his mindset is not good. By behaving the way he did, he was just confirming to the coach that it was better to leave him on the bench.

Play the best you can

I told him „next time you play, try to empty your mind and just fight and play the best way you can. Don't think about the time that you didn't play and concentrate on the minutes that were given to you“.

Last week-end, there was another match and I could watch him. The game lasts 3 times 25 minutes and the coach kept him out until 15 minutes before the end. It was a close game with a lot of emotions and the score was 1-1. When my son entered the field, I didn't recognize him. He run, fought and pushed guys that are 20 cm taller than him. The game developed and suddenly he was in front of the goal and pushed the ball over the line, scoring the winning goal.

All his teammates came to show appreciation and they even made a video in his honour in the changing rooms. After the game, he was really proud of himself and he told me that this was his best match ever.

The mindset made the difference

In a way the only thing that has changed was his mindset. Instead of complaining that he couldn't play more, he gave all he had in the little time that he played. He brought the victory to his team, he felt proud of himself and he had the appreciation of his teammates. He probably also gave another impression to his coach and maybe he will play a bit longer in the coming matches.

For me this is a very good metaphor for everything that we do in life. We are not always happy with how things go but we have always the choice how we deal with it. If we always try to give our best and remain positive in every situation, this will come back to us in one way or another.


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