Hi hives,
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Happiness is an emotion that I believe must not rely on external events or people. This is that one great emotion that helps you to flow smoothly with life. I met many people in my life and I scrutinized myself as well, that most of the time my happiness was heavily dependent upon the external influx. I was never completely independent and from within myself. And to live happily I indulged myself in a loop where I was looking out for something great to happen so I can be happy at least. But after continuous tries of uplifting myself this way I came to know that I was not doing justice to myself, I felt burn-outs on many instances, and I was restless.
After realizing the negatives of such doings, I changed myself inside-out on the emotional and behavioral levels. And currently, I am feeling that I am aligned with myself, and my thoughts and flowing smoothly in the stream of life. Hence this particular topic is so close to me and I know we all do such things with ourselves which just takes the entire joy out of life.
Be honest with yourself
The first and foremost requirement is this only. You have to be honest with yourself, you have to show compassion and share empathy with yourself. To be honest, doesn't mean that you have to fulfill the things that you have promised to yourself. It just means that you are constantly listening to yourself, and your inner voice, and taking guidance from it. And the advantage is that you do not have to rely on others' views in many aspects of your life. When you fulfill promises that you made to yourself - then just pat your back. But in case you fell short, just be with yourself and talk yourself out. Believe me, this practice of being continuous with yourself throughout the entire day will make you feel that you are accompanied by someone who truly feels you, understands you and is helping you out.
Simplify your life
Simplifying doesn't mean you have to throw fancy things out of your life, you do not have to lead a monk life. You just have to get rid of the things which are not meant for you. And the easy way of finding out what's meant for you or not - is to check what emotions you are feeling in the presence of that thing, and what short-term and long-term effects are going to be if you choose to be with it for a longer period. In a very decent manner, just like a gentleman, you have to kick-out such things out from your life. Such things can be rigid values, morals, ideals, thoughts, ideas, objects, and people which are giving you hard times.
Love your soul, mate!
Love yourself, and take yourself out of every negative thing just like you do for your dear ones when you know they are in negative situations. After all, you are watching out for yourself, pay good-sum gratitude to yourself as well. You are being with yourself every second, and you hardly give this its required attention. Take yourself, or your mom dad, or your close friends - dear ones, out for a dinner and just see how much better you start to feel.
Do something here and then - to uplift yourself! Be your great friend, appreciator, and your soulmate.