How many of you recognize the lyrics I used as the title of this article? Those that recognized it might even sing along as they read it, for those that don't, I will give you a hint; Justin Bieber. It's a very old, popular song and the video even has over 3.6 billion views on YouTube, Still no? Ok, moving on.
"I'm sorry". It's funny how this simple sentence can solve a lot of problems before it even starts but unfortunately, many people find it very hard to say these simple words and it usually comes from one source; ego (or pride, whatever you want to call it). We all know that there are many people that never want to admit they are wrong, even when it has been shown that they did something wrong, they rather laugh it off and pretend as if everything is okay.
I have come across people like that in the university and whenever they laugh off their wrongdoings and don't apologize afterward, I mostly ignore it because I believe I shouldn't tell people to apologize or say sorry, if they are really remorseful about what they did, then they should do the right thing and apologize. On that note, I have already given a hint on the type of person I am when it comes to saying sorry.
It's easy!
Yes, it's quite easy for me to say sorry BUT (of course, there's going to be a but!) I only do so when I did something wrong! Nobody is perfect and there are times when we mess up and make mistakes that end up hurting someone. When I find myself in a situation like that, I don't waste time before apologizing to the people I did wrong, it happens the instance I realize I'm in the wrong.
But you see that mentality of apologizing for something you didn't do simply because you want to appease the other person or because you don't want the issue to escalate? I find it absurd and it's something I don't do. You can call it ego or pride (or one other word I don't know about) but I believe everybody should own up to their mistake and apologize when they are in the wrong, I'm not going to be apologizing for the other person's sins, I'm not Jesus.
I hold very strong to that mentality to the extent that it has led to a breakup in the past (will I even call it a breakup? You will understand later). This happened many years ago (I think 2017 or thereabout) and I was in a relationship with this particular girl. Everything was going smoothly but one very day, I came on WhatsApp and got some angry messages from her saying I abandoned her for days and didn't even call.
What happened? My phone went bad for some days and after successfully gathering some money, I finally fixed it only for me to come online and meet that message from her. Before I explained all that to her, I simply asked her one question; "did you even call me to know what happened?" Then she said I'm the one that's supposed to call, "why will I call?", She added. Wow, I didn't say anything after that and blocked her on WhatsApp, I hate entitlement mentality and it looks like she was getting her relationship advice from movies.
A mutual friend called me later and after listening to my story, he said I should just explain it properly to her and then apologize (I should apologize for my phone going bad? Lmao). "You know how these women are na, just say sorry and everything will be settled". Instead of trying to explain why his advice is stupid, I simply told him that I was no longer interested in the relationship and then ended the call.
I have had similar experiences over the years but that particular one is the boss of them all. I will just assume it was because we were still quite young back then and we were still learning about how these things work but come on, that was just ridiculous, even both of them (my ex and the friend) will agree that it was all stupid if they think about the incidence today. Who knows, they might still be living with that mentality even today, after all the world needs simps.
Saying sorry when I'm wrong is very easy and that's because I usually put myself in people's shoes and try to imagine how I will feel if what I did to the person was done to me, and that's something a lot of people lack; empathy. But on the other hand, I don't say sorry for things I obviously don't do wrong just because I want peace to reign, even though the world will end or hell freezes over, let the violence continue.
Before I go, this is the Justin Bieber song I was talking about in the beginning, enjoy😉
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