It was one of those beautiful times I sat down with Mom to have conversations. Mom and I didn’t have the conventional mother and daughter relationship. Maybe it’s cause she had me when she was eighteen. But from the moment I remember, she always treated us like we were friends and it was the best gift I could ask for.
A mom who understood me, never judged and stood by my side no matter what. I loved Dad too but Mom was basically my ride or die.
So, here we were in our sunny kitchen, having our usual midday coffee. Yeah, she also indoctrinated me into the world of coffee. For as long as I remember, she always had a cup in her hand, sipping either tea or coffee, but mainly coffee. She’d sit by the balcony and have this dreamy look on her face.
“I love him, Mom,” I told her. “But I can’t be with him.” Mom didn’t say anything for a while and I didn’t say any more cause I knew she was looking for the right words to tell me.
“You know, love does conquer all.” Mom began. “But sometimes it’s not enough. You have to make sacrifices sometimes.”
“I don’t understand Mom,” I asked, genuinely confused. Mom never spoke so vaguely.
“Well, what do you know!” Mom said suddenly, glancing at her watch and standing to her feet. “I’m awfully late for the mall. You know today is Discount Wednesday. And we’re fresh out of groceries.”
“But mum-”
“And do me a favour, sweetie. The basement needs a little tidying. Can you see to it for me, please?’
I was exasperated at this point but I just nodded sulkily while she walked hurriedly away.
“Well, there goes our bonding time,” I said to myself wistfully. I walked to the basement to begin the tidying because as friendly as Mom was, she wasn’t so nice when her requests weren’t met.
I started with the shabby little cupboard, setting it in place. To my surprise, the lock fell off. The cupboard was always locked. I opened it unthinkingly and began perusing and then I came in contact with a box. I pulled it out and brushed the dust off. Opening it, I saw a letter which was tied quite carefully. It was addressed to Lily. Lily was mom’s name.
More than a little curious, I pulled the ribbon binding it off and started reading through, my head starting a steady pound.
Dearest Lily,
I sat by the lake a few metres from the plantation and looked wistfully into the water. I don’t know why I felt like this today of all days but I was immediately swept by nostalgia.
Of the times I sat right here to write letters to you. Of how the picture of your angelic smile in my head always kept me going. How the smell of coffee always reminds me of you. It’s like I was speechless and full of words at the same time. You always did that to me but I bet you knew that already.
Today, I sit by the lake and write. But now the image of your angelic smile brings tears to my eyes. I know before the postman can get this to you. You would already be married and I wish with all my heart that you didn’t leave.
You would always say the few times we met, in that diplomatic voice of yours that I should stop daydreaming and be practical. I wish that evil habit of mine didn’t cost me your love. I wish I didn’t realize too late that you meant much more to me than some silly booze.
It was never meant to be, was it? But now, today, I want to tell you that even though I’d have wanted you to be mine, your happiness matters more to me. I've realized that when it comes to love, it should be wholesome and if I neglect to see how unhappy my partner is, then it's no longer love.
I’ve heard how wonderful your husband-to-be is. He is a good man. And I trust that he’ll keep you safe and more than that, happy. Because, you deserve all the happiness in the world Lily. And from the depth of my heart, I hope your smile never ceases.
With all my love,
Jonathan.
I had tears in my eyes as I held the letter and stood up, coming face to face with Mom.
“Oh Mom,” I cried running into her arms.
“I want you to always be happy. Know when to stay and when it's time to walk away and always, follow your heart.”
As we held each other, crying, I knew what I had to do.
This is my response to the STB Prompt. All Rights Reserved. Copyright©️ Jhymi || 2023
