Am I excited? Nope!!
Being an adult, birthday never felt anything exciting to me. Especially now, when I'm crossing the number 30! Oh, the number is making me stressed. I turned 31 from today. It's continuously reminding me what I've achieved and not in life. I can't stop this thinking nor I can skip.
So, I was searching online and also knocked some of my friends to check if everyone else feels the same. And you can guess what feedback I got. Yeah, it's totally normal to feel sort of sad because we are aging. But it's totally okay, we are not old (never say that I'm old). hahaha...
To be honest, I never feel old or anything like this. But it's true I sometimes think that time is running and I still didn't reach my destination. It's a journey, I know and we never can ensure everything that we want. But I have to approve that I'm still lagging behind my dreams. It's not like that I have a big dream which is tough or something unachievable but still, it sometimes makes me feel sad.
However, I know how to be positive. I really have no regrets about my life, not about a single thing.
But...
I had a plan to become 'second time' Mom before my 30's. But I couldn't gather the courage to rare another baby along with my restless toddler, I need more time to mentally prepare myself. Also, I had some plan to raise my earning on a certain level (though it was not my priority) but I couldn't achieve that too. So, these small things actually pocking me and maybe it will continue. But it's okay!
What did I do today?
My husband ordered some of my favorite food from my favorite restaurants. Also, he surprised me with a birthday cake. Or maybe I shouldn't call it a surprise. Because in this COVID situation I was asking where he's going and he had to approve that he was going out to buy a birthday cake. But I didn't pick to see what he bought. I would call it a half-surprise! :)
And my son was super excited. He is 3 and this is the first time he understands it clearly that it's mom's birthday. He drew something random throughout the day and said it's a gift. Those are really a gift for me.
I'm not excited nor sad, passing time just like any other days. But it was a good day indeed.
THANKS FOR YOUR LOVE AND SUPPORT!
Much Love
I'm a life & nature enthusiast, I love to learn human psychology, I'm a 'Book worm' and very introvert but also love to travel. I'm trying to live mindfully and most importantly, I'm a positive learner.
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