Mother’s Day comes with a torrent of emotions that swirl around inside me like the perfect storm. It is the merger of sweet memories and regrets. My sweet, beautiful mother is gone from this world; she is no more - she soared from this earth, high into the heavens and I sit here and cling to my memories.
I have read that there are no parameters for this, losing your mother, is a forever and ever amen, kind of journey. I have found some holidays are harder than others.
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Mother’s Day without a mother. Not the first. Not any longer. That was a couple of years ago that I put those words on paper, in a torrent of tears and a heart that was broken..
Holidays are always special in my house, but, I must say though, people(myself included) attach more importance and worth on those special days when in reality, every day there is someone out there grieving, and it is a hard day. By the time the actual holiday arrives, the worst is over. But, lest you think I have sunk into a pit of depression, I assure you I am fine.
I read this yesterday and it is so, so true. “My grief on this first Mother’s Day without my mother isn’t just missing buying her a card or gift. I take comfort in remembering that she was the gift, and one I can cherish for the rest of my life.” Life will not go on the same way without my mom. If it did, it would conclude her life meant nothing and had no contribution.
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It was always the little things that caught her eye or grabbed her attention. The shape of a leaf, the magic of a rainbow, the way her voice sounded when she was excited about life. Small, tiny little catches in the fabric of life. I have come to appreciate more these tiny pieces of her, appreciate because I miss seeing them. Small little details.
I want to wish everyone a Happy Mother’s Day. May your day be filled with sunshine and happiness. Much love to you on this day and those that follow.
And just like that, my post is done. Until next time! As always, I want to thank you for taking the time to stop by for a chat and a read!! Have a most fabulous day!
All I have are my words, armed in my mind, written in pen, stand by stand. Oh, yes. Still by hand. It has a different feel. Altered not by keys, backspace, and delete, I write, erase, tear it to pieces and start all over again. And again.
It’s my way. I walk out to the deep end of the page and dive right in.
The Naming of Cats
The Naming of Cats is a difficult matter,
It isn’t just one of your holiday games;
You may think at first I’m as mad as a hatter
When I tell you, a cat must have THREE DIFFERENT NAMES.
TS Elliot
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