Talk It Out Thursday: Family Feud

The new year is gone, so next week means we’ll be back to our typical work mood.

My siblings too would be at school as they are to resume this Monday.

I have siblings on both my dad's side and my mom's side. This made me spread out between two worlds. And being the firstborn means I’ve got to balance my life - between my mom's side and dad's side.

Tbh, responsibilities are scary

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It’s weird when I have to make sure I don’t care for one side over the other, and this has made my life seem complicated due to how I’ve got to keep both households in order as my dad and mom are already too old to be on everyone’s

On New Year’s Day, I tried to make my siblings from my dad's side happy while also not neglecting my siblings from my mom's side.

I gave my siblings some cash for the festive season. It’s just pocket money and not that much really.

But when it came to thinking about whether I should give something to my dad's wives as a token of love, I was sceptical about whether I should do it or not.

There are two, and one of them is my favourite, which was the one who brought me up but isn’t my biological mother. Regardless I have always loved and cared for her like she was my birth mother. She also does the same as am her son. If you don’t even know about my family from the onset, you’ll believe I’m her son, of which I am.

However, the second wife, who was the last, is also a good woman in her way, but she’ll never share anything of value with you, be it money or anything of value. In short, she’s the stingy type, I don’t know whether that’s the right word, or I’m just being harsh, but she’s really like that. But even still I made sure I tried my best, which was after I sought my dear mom about it, and she said I should go for it, so I bought them gifts.

To my surprise, she asked me where I got money to purchase such things for her. I went silent because I honestly don’t know what to say, as anything you say about having anything to do with the online world is always tagged to be some form of fraudulent activity. So I went numb, she prayed and wished me well enough that I knew she was happy about it.

However, someone who’s our neighbour and who knows the last one very well kind of got the news about my gdoings so she asked me why I would have tried something like that because she’s not a good woman, and she doesn’t deserve that due to how she treated me I’m the past.

I told her that all sins are forgiven and even if I don’t what’s the essence of carrying garbage of hair that’s from the past and letting it affect my present situation? These days I have been trying to heal from all my past wounds and experiences, although they leave their scars, I believe they are the push I needed to get a taste of what life is all about and what it isn’t about.

The other wife, who was very dear to me, also got her present and I still feel it wasn't enough to repay her for all her care and guidance when I was way younger and up to now.

If I had to follow what my neighbour said, I would’ve just bought something for my dearest alone without having to worry about the other wife.

Tbh, it’s something that is not easy for me to do, but I've got to give freely without expecting anything, at least this was how I was raised, which is to pray for your enemies.

Jesus even said to his men to turn the other cheek, although this is philosophical and doesn't imply only to just you being slapped and turning the other cheek, it's deeper than that, and I feel that's where my soul, body, and mind is evolving to (nowadays).

It’s challenging to not be affected by family feuds, but I think I can control how I react, which is to turn the other cheek and buy my not-so-loving pals/friends/families/brother something to show I still care no matter what feud we've harboured from the past

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