Being completely transparent, I should probably have entitled this post, look, I found myself in some trees, but I'm sometimes a little cheeky, my guy thinks it's cute, so I've told a little white lie in the title... The truth of it is I didn't find the trees at all, everyone knows they're there, but I found myself in them and that counts, yes?
I went walking today and my patient, kind and loving man got sort of angry with me for it. He's currently away for work and the location where I went walking...let's just say he doesn't like me going there alone.
He worries, not being here to be all manly and protective over me. He's taught me some moves, I'm not totally defenseless, but if it came down to it I'd probably be overpowered quite easily should someone attack me; I really shouldn't have gone, I know that, but I needed the moment, the walk and the soothing effect of nature. It was worth the lecture I got after I told him I went there and not for a minute was I going to admit to him that I was scared the entire time.
I didn't take any photos today so have used a picture my boy took of me a little while ago but the effect is the same I guess, there's trees in it, and I think you'll get the idea.
My goal was some time to feel better and I find that being with nature, being still in my soul, and quiet, helps me do that. We have had so many complications lately and are both feeling the pressure of life. We know things will improve but with my mother's illness, terminal cancer, and the treatments and effect of it, we know things will get far worse before improving and the feelings, emotions and pain of it along the way, it's just not easy to deal with. The rest of life sort of adds to it as well, and we're feeling a little weighed down. I don't really have the words to say I suppose, I had hoped that writing here would bring them out but it has not, but the walk helped.
I enjoyed my walk today and the ensuing lecture from my guy for walking there by myself wasn't all that bad; he is so worried for me and I love that he cares so much even though it stresses him out when he's away. I feel better though, and we're looking forward to having dinner together on Friday night when he gets back at a lovely little restaurant we like; he told me he's bought me a little surprise gift too, so I'm looking forward to that; I think it's a teapot in the shape of a cat, I'm good at guessing surprises, and I'm pretty sure I'll love it...but love his company more; I miss him when he's away.
