Hello Ladies👋...It's been a while.
Welcome to my little hive nook.😊
This is my entry to the 95th edition of the ladies of hive contest.
We all have a different boiling point, some of us are easily angered, others are really cool-tempered. Kindly share one thing that makes you angry, how long do you stay mad, and what or who can pacify you.
My Temper Explained...
I have a very contrasting temper. My default is cool, calm and collected but I can also be a raging bull when all the wrong strings are pulled. I live a pretty simple life with some rules/principles others may perceive as stoic and unfriendly but these have helped minimize negative encounters and clashes with people around me.
As long as my boundaries are respected and I have an understanding with someone, there is rarely a cause for a fight. I try my best to reciprocate the respect for boundaries, that way there's no encroachment and the chance of there being a flare-up on either side is reduced.
I am not quick to anger so it takes a lot to make me mad. This mostly depends on the action that pushed me to anger and/or the person involved in the action. In contrast to this, I get annoyed easily by things that are supposedly seen as trivial.
I can't accurately explain it but I've noticed that my flare-ups at little things usually turn out to be a result of accumulated tolerance of equally annoying actions. So what one may see as an unnecessary reaction to a small meaningless situation is mostly me at my boiling point with my patience running thin.
Things that get on my nerves...
As already previously suggested, blatant disrespect of my boundaries can annoy me. This may seem rigid but we all know ourselves better than anyone else and I don't think there's anything wrong with living your life in your tenets as long as it isn't causing harm to the people around you.
I dislike being ordered around. Not enough to get on my nerves? Well, I beg to differ. I used to get ordered around a lot, mostly by older people. In my culture, disrespecting older people is very frowned upon so I found myself doing things, even those that make zero sense, just because I was ordered by an older person, or someone with more authority, to do so.
The main problem I have with this besides the obvious abuse of power sometimes is the assumption that I do not possess a mind of my own. I do and I'm very capable of making decisions on my own without the unwanted help of someone that has no clue about what is good for me.
Another pet peeve of mine is unfairness. I believe in fairness to everyone. Seeing and experiencing situations where someone else or myself is treated unfairly makes me mad. I've never been one to shy away from speaking up for what I think is right so that's exactly what I do in these situations.
One thing I dislike about my anger is how much I lose control. I mostly do/say things I end up regretting after my anger has died down. It's like I act out for the right reasons in a very irrational manner which I later regret. When I play back the events in my mind, I think of better ways I could've handled the situation.
I wish most times that I can have rational anger, the type that doesn't rob me of my usual level-headedness. I don't think that's possible but all I can do is learn to get a better grip on myself when I feel the rage taking over.
Anger duration and management...
I don't stay mad for long, at least I try not to. It usually feels like the calm after the storm for me. I sometimes feign prolonged anger to convey the extent of my emotions to whoever the anger is directed at.
I also forgive easily but it's not always easy to forget. I strongly believe in the once bitten twice shy saying and it helps avoid a repeat of whatever made me angry in the first place.
Talking about whatever caused the outburst helps me deal with it. I can't talk about it to just anyone though. It has to be someone that understands me and cares about me enough to make me see things clearly and let me know if I did any wrong.
I'd like to invite @samsmith1971 to share her own experiences with the ladies of hive🤗.
Thank you @ladiesofhive. Thanks @ifarmgirl for this brilliant topic😊.
Dear reader,your time is very appreciated.❤️
