Loh#158 Dear Diary i missed writing in you

Dear diary,
Its been a while since i talked to myself through you . So many things have changed I'm not a little girl anymore that i used to be . Im no longer bitter with my family , i have been so calmer however as we grow we change and then we need other things in life . Im happy and grateful to be able to afford my own life now however its not enough to be happy back then when i last wrote in you .I said i wish i would be able to take art as an career one day which i did but now i have another goal . The goal to be a better person and a better woman .I wanna prioritize me now , dear diary i lost all my friends some to Prioritizing my work life first and some to envy others i lost to them being busy in life . It is hard to make new friends as a 24 year old . Dear diary its been a while since i went out in gatherings , i hate it when people ask me what am i doing with my life and i tell them about my journey and all they do is sigh and say "You have to get married now " Dear diary , its not like I don't wanna marry i do but , its just that i feel the other person won't be the same towards me after it . Marriage itself feels scary when i see all these wonderful women around me being bound to prioritize their kids their family and forgetting that they even have an identity . Dear diary i hope i can come over this fear and live a better joyful life someday soon .
I wish i can make friends again , i wish i can be a more successful artist and i wish i stop loosing my people because of taking care of myself . I wish i find people who don't put me first but atleast don't leave when i put my needs first . I wish to be healthy prosperous. I want the world to be a better place for everyone to live in . Lets end it here till the next time i write in you .
Your's Truly Rabiya

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