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Sarcasm

Sarcasm is a sharp, bitter, cutting expression or remark; a bitter gibe or taunt. Some are downright insulting, while some are rude, and at the same time, humorous. Sometimes, people are momentarily stunned by a sarcastic remark. They are not sure whether whoever said it was being funny, or whether they were being rude. They do not know whether to laugh, or to feel offended.

Call them sarcasm, glorious insults, or whatever you can come up with, the following bitter, or cutting expressions, will surely bring on a chuckle, or a smile at least. Enjoy!

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Nowadays, you can't call a spade a spade anymore. You have to be creative and come up with terms, or other names for the said spade. In our progressively civilised society, we have to be mindful of our politically correctness. Here are some...

Politically Correct Ways to Say Someone is Stupid

  • A beer short of a six-pack
  • A few clowns short of a circus
  • A few feathers short of a whole duck
  • A few fries short of a Happy Meal
  • A few peas short of a casserole
  • A little wanting in the top storey
  • All foam, no beer
  • As smart as bait
  • Bright as Alaska in December
  • Does not have all his cornflakes in one box
  • Donated his brain to science before he was done using it
  • Elevator does not go all the way to the top floor
  • Gates are down, lights are flashing, but the train is not coming
  • He is depriving some village of an idiot
  • He is living proof that man can live without a brain
  • He is not the brightest light in the harbour
  • He is so dense, light bends around him
  • He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle
  • His antenna does not pick up all the channels
  • His belt does not go through all the loops
  • If brains were taxed, he would get a refund
  • If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you will get change
  • It is hard to believe he beat one million other sperm
  • No grain in the silo
  • Not the brightest crayon in the box
  • Not the sharpest knife in the drawer
  • One sandwich short of a picnic
  • Proof that evolution can go in reverse
  • Receiver is off the hook
  • Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, he only gargled
  • The light is on but no one is home
  • The wheel is spinning, but the hamster is dead
  • Too much yardage between the goalposts

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