"Dad, should we pack the espresso machine, and that gourmet coffee package Grandma sent you for your birthday?"
The man chuckled as he looked at his young son. "No Mike, we'll have plenty of coffee on board. The best that money can buy."
"But don't boats usually run out of things? We can't just go to the store out there, Dad."
Dad set down his handful of folded shirts, and sat on the bed. "It's not just a boat, it's a luxury cruise. It's like staying in a fancy hotel, on a floating city. They have everything you can imagine. Even restaurants!"
Soon the big day arrived, and the family boarded the Princess Exoticalina.
Mike's eyes widened as he took in everything the massive ship had to offer. "You're right Dad, this is cool!"
Three days into the cruise, Captain Cawwal heard a respectful tapping on his door. "Come in."
A purser slowly opened the door, and stepped in. He gulped before speaking. "Excuse me, Captain Cawwal. I was listening to the radio, and heard that Premium-Grade International Coffee is recalling all of their products from the last three months."
Captain Cawwal swore. Then he glanced at the cup on his own table. "I know they're our main supplier. Lock up all of the recalled coffee, and bring me the key. Then take inventory of what else we have. We will set strict rations, with our guests being top priority. We only have twelve more days until we get to the next port..."
"Aye, Captain," the purser replied glumly.
The total amount of coffee on board which was safe for consumption turned out to be five cases of the instant variety. It was for the engine crew, as they demanded their drinks be strong enough to walk.
"How are we going to handle this, Captain?" asked the man who had discovered the recall.
"Have you told anyone else about the situation yet, Carlson?"
"No, Captain. I didn't want to create any disruption."
"Good. We can stall for a couple of days. Have the servers say that they need to offer a replacement of juice, milk, tea, and other beverages."
"That should work for a while. But twelve days? And the crew needs coffee too."
"I know. Things are going to get ugly eventually, the best we can do is delay it for as long as possible."
As predicted, they were only able to stall for so long. Then unrest, followed by anger spread throughout the passengers and crew.
"I have to make an announcement... I've waited too long already," thought Captain Cawwal. "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. This is your captain speaking. I regret to inform you that our main supplier of fine coffee, Premium-Grade International Coffee, is recalling all of their products from the last three months."
At this revelation, the massive vessel began to rock from the movement of thousands of shocked passengers.
Captain Cawwal took a drink of water, then continued. "We do however have a very limited supply of instant coffee. This is to be rationed out until we reach our next port. Guests may receive one six ounce cup per day, and crew members will receive three ounces."
It took several seconds for this to sink in. Then hisses, shouts, and threats could be heard everywhere.
The complaints varied. From shunning the idea of touching instant coffee, to being horrified they would only be receiving one cup a day. Regardless, they were all loud. Each person felt like they should receive special treatment.
As much as some people complained about the instant coffee, that was nothing compared to the uproar when it ran out. There was a very real danger of mutiny!
People began to search high and low. Rumors abounded that the crew had a secret stash. Amongst the crew, there was talk of breaking down the door to get at the forbidden recalled coffee.
"Dad, why are the adults so mad? Isn't this supposed to be fun?" asked Mike. He was in boxers, with a pair of goggles on his head, and a snorkel in his hand.
Dad looked at the child. His withdrawal was severe, but the boy was right. They were supposed to be having fun.
"Us adults need coffee. And the whole supply on this ship is bad. It'll be fine after we reach land, and can get some supplies. But you go have fun."
Mike grinned. "I told you, you should have brought your own."
Dad grimaced. "It's too late now, isn't it..."
Eventually the ship arrived on a small Caribbean island, ironically called Coffee Coffee.
By the time the coffee starved Princess Exoticalina was finished with the place, not a bean nor ground could be found anywhere on the island of Coffee Coffee.
Satisfied, the floating city went on its way - in search of more of the sacred drink which most of the world takes for granted.
And this was how my first cruise went... I'm just glad that I was too young to drink coffee at the time!
The experience taught me to always be prepared, far more effectively than the Boy Scouts could have. I'll always pack my own coffee stash, wherever I go.
Cover image made in Canva Pro using their gallery