My signature move? Find an NFT I like, convince myself it has generational potential, buy it and then hold it into absolute oblivion. Floor down 90%? I’m holding. Volume dead? I’m holding.
Everyone moved on three narratives ago? I’m still here staring at my JPEG like it owes me money. Some people trade. I collect emotional attachments. Wingston from RallyOnChain was added to my NFT vault!
Every morning I check the Crypto Dads group chat for early alpha and the discussions are mind blowing! Satoshi: "I just went out for milk." CZ: "Who's buying the dip?" Vitalik: drops a 47-message explanation nobody reads.
Michael Saylor: "Have you tried buying more Bitcoin?" The guy who sold at the bottom: "This is definitely the top." Every morning starts with "GM." and every night ends with "We're still early."
I've muted it by day two... but I will never leave. I wonder when Trump will join the chat! My kryptonite? FOMO! I tell myself "Skip this one" but then FOMO kicks in! I can't help my urge!
I see people posting screenshots, the timeline goes crazy, and suddenly I'm bridging to another chain at 2:17 AM convincing myself this time it's different. I've survived rugs, missed 100x pumps, and still haven't learned.
See you at the next "can't miss" opportunity. Hope this time wasn't just a FOMO exploration! My most downbad crypto take?I thought prediction markets were the future. I was super wrong!
Then I discovered the wonderful art of turning an entire portfolio into a collection of losing positions because apparently “I have a thesis” is not a risk management strategy. If I have an opinion, apparently I needed to bet on it.
Football, crypto, politics, random events... if there was a market, I had an opinion. Prediction markets didn't just humble me. They found my portfolio, emptied its pockets and left me with a life lesson.
I was not the market maker. I was the exit liquidity. Then I panic bought CASHKITTEN on Robinhood because apparently my crypto strategy is now “see cat, buy cat.” Then I found out it gives me passive CASHCAT just for holding it.
So technically I didn’t panic buy a meme coin... I panic bought a cat that pays me in cats. This might be the most ridiculous purchase I've made in crypto, and somehow I’m not even mad about it.
There was a time when I had the perfect trade, the perfect entry, the perfect profit sitting right in front of me. What did I do? Took screenshots. I had the unrealised gains, stared at the number, imagined what I could cash out, then convinced myself it would go even higher.
Spoiler: it did not. Now the screenshots are basically historical documents and I’m sitting here crying over profits I never actually had. The market taught me the difference between “I made money” and “I could have made money” the hard way.
Alpha stuff:
Claim your Zerion XP!
Play2Earn: Splinterlands & Holozing
