The air went still in that way it only does when something has already gone wrong. I just closed my eyes for a second. I breathed slowly, just like she told me to. Why is it cold? Why am I outside? What was I doing? I was laying in bed like a corpse. Am I on top of this building? What a rush. Is this how it feels to be energetic and careless? I can see people roaming, hanging out. What dumb, pathetic creatures we are. I see through all of you. I am here. I can judge you all. This cold breeze is making me feel like I have a soul.
The rush in my veins, I have not felt it in a long time. What is this? Am I happy or sad? I feel alive.
There is only one life, and I feel for everyone.
But the feeling does not stay for long. It never does. The air shifts again, heavier now, like the everything is holding its breath with me. That is when I notice it, the reflection where mine should be. Oh no, not another monster. The clarity. Oh no, there is no rush left. What am I doing here, looking down? This cold sense of judgment. I tell myself I am still human, even though the rush is going away. But it does not feel right. I just do not want to do anything anymore. Yeah, yeah, just go to your bed. I wonder if the monster is not approaching at all. It is already standing.
You always say that when you see me. Not another monster. As if I arrive from somewhere else. As if I wasn’t already here when you closed your eyes, when you felt that rush and mistook it.
The image is AI generated.
