Pen down, I start with a thankful note to life. The last shot of injection was meant to end the dizziness and the sickness that has camped me in like a mother does her baby but, hell!!!...That was the aftermath of the last shot.
It started as a joke with one or two rashes on my skin which I thought was because of the recent heat in the country, but It became hell when the itchiness started. I don't know what you classify as hell but looking at the Biblical definition of it, I will go with that.
In the last couple of days that followed after I wrote my last post here for January about my health, all I felt was plain misery. I wouldn't deny I didn't silently beg for death when the pain was unbearable and threatening. I was tired, frustrated, and ready to give up after the intake of the last shot of injection on the 28th of January 2023 which was on a Saturday. I felt dizzy and needed to rest which was usual, but I never knew the spirit that pushed me toward packing some little clothes in my bag to go over to my Sister's house which was unlike me. Thank goodness I did it anyways. When I got to her place, I rested, and what started as a normal rash on the skin began to be itchy that it spread all over my body and that wasn't a joke.
I almost lost it all but having my loved ones around did help out though, I could only feel the emotional, physical, and spiritual pain it brought in. I watched as my once fine smooth skin turned rough and red like an artist's unfinished sculpture that needs lots of attention. My nurse came over to administer drugs and I had lots of funds to pay from an empty pocket. I took the drugs but the pain was still there unlike injection which works at a fast rate. Every pore on my skin was open to any passing illness and it hurts badly. I felt like a battleground that allows every man to drop in dead leaving me with the aftermath of the cruel event. You know how it feels when you haven't ended one battle and another comes in... telling you it doesn't care a bit if you still have unfinished businesses? That was the dilemma that wrapped me in.
I felt and saw how my body got swollen. I couldn't walk or hold anything... I felt hopeless and dead. Though I was able to eat a little and swallow until the swollen tragedy got to my throat, my lips, and my tongue... And right there, the real battle began! I couldn't eat anything even when I felt hungry. My food had to be in liquid form so that I could use my drugs and I have to confess that it was hard and very painful. I detest taking drugs but at that moment, drugs became my best buddy.
My mind didn't swirl around with millions of thoughts to keep me going instead, just a thought kept popping up, the thought that was weak and tired, and prayed for everything to end. I was long dead but prayer still works, miracles still happen, and love still heals. With these ingredients, I felt my spiritual part waking up to fight, my physical side rocking, and my emotional part ready to work as I lift my eyes to see that I have indeed won a battle. The battle fought wasn't the battle of the mind and body but the battle of health. It was a tough ride and thank God for life, the prayers sent my way, and the endless calls to show me that I did matter.
These past few days were terrible experiences that are embedded in my memory. I later decided to consult Google on my recent impediment and it didn't shock me much with the answer given... We all know how Google can be and it turns out all that I felt were in the critical stage that needs urgent medical supervision, how dramatic!
My phone, on the other hand, became faulty and I had to take money out of an empty pocket to have it fixed which was a miracle. I don't know how God kept doing amazing things for me, and I am super grateful. I needed to come back online after days that felt like years of living in an ancient world and it is good to be back as writing is where I find peace, calmness, and love as it takes me on different aspects of life while sitting in one place... How interesting that is!
My prayer goes to those who are ailed. It isn't easy. The battle is hell-bent on making us hopeless, but
let's not give up. I pray for quick recoveries, and right here, I drop my pen till the new dawn when we get to meet again.